An Unfolding Future
by mplsveela
Summary: This is a story of not realizing what you have, until it's gone, Lily grew up with James,and there was a time before she hated him that she considered him her best friend.Once Lilys betrayed she must choose to make things happen or let her future unfold.
1. Prologue: Start of Something New

**Summary:** This is a story of not realizing what you have, until it's gone… Lily grew up with James, and there was a time before she hated him that she considered him, her best friend. Once a close friend betrays Lily her world falls apart. She must then choose to make things happen or simply let her future unfold.

**Disclaimer:** This world belongs to J.K. Rowling, I am just playing around with characters and ideas already created.

**A/N:** I have revised every chapter to make it in 3rd person, and made a lot of changes, however, I don't have a beta, so if you see something and you think, mplsveela, what were you thinking? Feel free to tell me so in a comment. ;)

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Chapter 1: Prologue: Start of Something New

It was by way of pure chance that the Evan family would move and come to inhabit a dominantly wizard community. The Potter's only son was just 4, as was the Evan's youngest girl when they came to be part of each other's lives.

The Evan's thought nothing of the coldness of the other neighbors with the overwhelming love and warmth that radiated from their new friends down the way. From the very first time these families made acquaintance it was clear they would be seeing each other often.

"She's pretty," said the young boy confidently, gleaming at the young girl peaking out opposite him. His parents were standing behind him with distracted smiles on their faces as they tried to keep the boy standing still.

Mrs. Evans just smiled, letting kindness fill up her features before she nudged her own young girl front of her to face the new boy. Young Lily had been hiding behind her and just peeking out from her legs that she so desperately clung too.

"This is Lily," Debra, Lily's mother proclaimed to the new boy, pushing her forward with both hands on her daughters small back. Lily however was pushing back against her with as much force as she was being pushed forward. This boy looked dirty and his hair looked like he had never combed it before in his life. The girl made no effort to hide her disgust, but even so the boy continued to gleam at his new friend.

"I'm James!" he squeaked and at last broke free of his parents' hold on him. He grabbed onto her hand with his sticky fingers and pulled her to the swing set placed on the side of the Evans house. That day which was the result of pure chance, would unknowingly be the beginning of both families' lives.

James did not attend elementary school like Lily, and he was instead home schooled. This left Lily as his only friend he had his own age. And despite her efforts, Lily couldn't budge his parents on letting James come to school with her. As their friendship grew over time, so did their parents friendships, a rarity among wizard families. The Evans didn't know it at the time, but they had become the stepping-stone in making one of the oldest pureblood families officially 'blood traitors'.

One night several years later, the summer before Lily would begin 6th grade, James was yet again spending a night at the Evan's house while his parents were away.

"Lily?" James asked, seeking his friend's attention. He was lying in his trundle bed on his back with his head turned toward hers. Mrs. Evan's had eventually just bought a trundle to keep in her youngest daughter's room since James stayed over so often.

"Ya?" a sleepy Lily replied, annoyed.

"You'll be my best friend no matter what, right?"

This got her attention; she sat up and looked around the low-lit room for something missing or broken. Her eyes lingered particularly long on a flawless china doll collection; if so much as a hair was out of place James Potter would regret it.

"Jeez! I didn't break anything Lily!" James said surprised, rolling his eyes when he saw her eyes narrow at him.

Lily then relaxed back into her pillow then, fanning out her long red hair "Well of course then. Best friends forever right? You know that."

"Even if I have to move away and I will only live here during the summer?" he spat out, very quickly.

'Life without James?' Lily thought to herself. She slowly nodded with a look of concern on her face, but James was obviously pleased with the response and grinned at her before rolling over to his side to sleep. They always took what each other said for truth, no further explanation was ever needed. Sometimes even just a look could do the talking.

The next day, when James was back at home, Lily thought about what he said. She asked Mrs. Evans and she said he was finally going to start going to school, but it was private and he would be living there. This news upset Lily. She always thought that if he ever decided to start going to school he would go to hers and then they could have the same friends. She knew the Potters had good jobs, even if she wasn't exactly clear as to what it was they did, but they certainly could afford to send James to get the best education possible. With a pang of jealousy she let her mind go over all the new friends he would make. Sure she made friends at her school, but she came home everyday. James would forget her.

With all this in mind, she decided to make James a friendship bracelet. It took her all day and Lily felt very satisfied with the outcome. Her friends from school always made them for each other. And although she had never really seen a boy wear one, she didn't think James would know about the trend anyways. She dug through her fossil thread collection and found the manliest color combination she could, maroon and gold.

Once finished, the red head skipped her way unknowingly down the wizard inhabited street to the Potters to hand deliver her gift.

"James, Lily is here!" Jaci Potter yelled up the stairs.

A door opened somewhere upstairs with a quick creak, and James appeared bounding down the stairs.

"I have a present for you," Lily said, proudly and full of excitement. "Hold out your wrist and close your eyes."

"Hold out my wrist? You didn't get me jewelry, did you? I'm a BOY remember?" he groaned, rolling his eyes.

"Fine. I guess I'll just keep this then," she said, dangling the bracelet out eye level before him.

James eyes widened as he smiled and snatched it from her waving hand.

"You made this Lily? What for?" he was now handing it back to her and holding out his wrist.

"I thought you didn't want any jewelry, you're a BOY, remember?" She teased him holding the bracelet behind her back now.

"Well I didn't know you made it, and those are my favorite colors!" he said reaching around and effortlessly grabbing the bracelet from her. Keep away games were impossible with James so Lily didn't bother trying very hard.

She proceeded to put it on her best friend's wrist and explained, "This is a friendship bracelet, you make them for your best friends, and I made myself one too in the same colors. So now even when you are away you will remember me!" and she held out her wrist so he could see she already had one on. That seemed to make him happy.

"Maroon and gold look good on you Lils," he said, quietly and a bit sad.

"Well if you already made one for yourself then I don't even have to get you anything," he added, recovering quickly.

"Well you wouldn't get anything for me anyways, would you? It's a going away present, and I'm not going anywhere," she paused after she finished and then seemed to find something very interesting about her lime green shoe laces.

"I'm sorry Lily; I wish I could bring you with me." James said it with sincerity, trying to convey that he would truly miss his one companion.

The next week found James sneaking around the side of his home, away from any windows his parents would be near. If what his mum said was true, today was bound to be the best day of his life, of his entire existence! But he had to be sure; he had to have proof.

As discretely as he could, he climbed onto his junior model broomstick and flew over to the Evans through the woods so not to be seen. It wasn't that he was afraid of being spotted by muggles, the Evans were only one of two non-magical families in the entire town. But if his parents caught him, he could surely kiss his new broomstick goodbye.

The Evan's kitchen door was unlocked, as it usually was, and he crept into the kitchen breathing a sigh of relief when he found it unoccupied. After a scan, his eyes found the proof he was so desperately seeking. A small envelope lay upon their kitchen counter, with the same slanted scrawl that he had seen on his own mail this morning. He glanced back and saw an owl waiting on their wrought iron fence that he had failed to notice before.

Gingerly he picked up the envelope to examine it. It was definitely the same penmanship in which his letter had been addressed in. But the envelope felt as though it carried different contents. He furrowed his brow in confusion, why would Hogwarts send Lily a different letter than the one he received.

As he mulled over the possibilities while at the same time fighting the urge to simply open her letter, her heard the distinct creaking of the 4th stair. He quickly threw the letter out of his hand and dashed out of the kitchen and just made it out the door the same time Petunia, Lily's older sister was entering.

He didn't dare ride his broomstick home with Petunia aware of his minor break in. When safely back at home he laid on the sofa for over an hour trying to remember times when Lily had shown magic. How had it slipped his notice?

Meanwhile, back at the Evan's, a sobbing 11 year old Lily was refusing to listen to her Mother.

"I don't want to be sent away, I promise I'll never do it again Mummy. I promise!" she sobbed, letting tears dampen the front of her skirt.

"Now quit this Lily. No one is sending you away; you're simply going to school with other children who are special just like you. Now pull yourself together," she added as Lily let out another loud sob.

"A school for other kids who make a lot of things happen by _accident_ Mum? Because that's what they were! I never meant for Petunias hair to … contract." Lily had in fact made Petunias' hair go back into her hair, like reversed growth in the midst of a squabble.

Mrs. Evan's decided to pointedly ignore Lily's protests, and hoped that the arrival of the promised help would sort her out. The letter explained a family nearby would becoming over at 11 am to explain Lily's … accidents. She had no hope of explaining to her youngest daughter she wasn't in trouble, when she herself hadn't any idea what was going on either.

At 10:50 the entire Evan's family sat down in the lounge to wait for neighbor that would help clear the air a bit. They had barely sat down when the doorbell rang and the most unexpected people greeted them.

Debra let out a cry of delight and threw her arms around Jaci. Harold Potter grinned at the pair, and James scurried past them into the lounge to find Lily at last.

"You're the ones who are going to help our Lily?" Debra asked, dumbfounded.

"You could say that," Jaci smiled.

James found Lily to be crying in the center of the couch and was unsure of how to approach her. This was supposed to be the best moment of his life, and he had not stopped to think Lily would be upset. Who would be upset about possessing magic?

He grinned and approached her like he normally would, then stooped down and grabbed by the shoulders and shook her lightly.

"C'mon Lils, this is great news! You're a witch!" he exclaimed.

Lily's head jerked up at the last word and at the same time James leapt back with a yelp.

"You burned me!" he exclaimed with a finger pointing at her accusingly.

"And I'll do it again James Potter!" she screamed before stomping over to her sister looking for comfort. Lily received no such thing however. Petunia promptly stood from her seat so that her sister would have no chance of touching her.

"Come to burn me too, freak?" Petunia shouted.

To an outsider the look on Lily's face would probably read like her entire world was over. And that is exactly how Lily felt. Wasn't her world over?

She stood rejected by a fuming Petunia and looked to her parents, then to James' parents. "Will someone please explain?"

To everyone's surprise, Mr. Potter was the first to respond to Lily's desperate plea. He walked forward and swung her onto his lap, and filled her in on what she needed to know about the wizarding world, while everyone else listened in.

"And everything else you want to know, I can help you with!" James added excitedly. He had literally been hanging on his fathers every word, and had practically ended up in his fathers lap as well.

"Good idea!" Mrs. Evans chimed in for the first time since Harold had begun his speech. "How about we pitch the tent in back for you two? I'm sure your just bursting with information for Lily," she finished. Her intention was in fact to get the kids out of the house, so she could have a more private discussion with the Potters about the wizarding world.

"No way!" James said, "We can _finally_ use my tent!"

So the Evan's accepted that there was an entirely different world living within their world. And James took it as his sole responsibility to introduce his best friend to his world, which he had been dying to tell her since they were 6.

Lily felt overloaded, but suddenly everything made sense, like all these little gaps in her life were filled. Best of all, her and James wouldn't be separated at all. From her understanding, they had 7 more years of an even stronger friendship to look forward to.

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**A/N:** So that is the newly _re-written_ prologue to my story. I think it's better, so if you're a first time reader, lucky you. And if your re-reading this, I hope you enjoyed it! The next chapter will still jump to year 3, and was written before D.H. so Snape will not be living down the street, incase you were wondering why I would do something so odd.

Enjoy! – Your very own MplsVeela.


	2. Jokes on me

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A/N: End of third year. Same Disclaimer applies.

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Lily sighed as the pale green sundress laid out on her bed caught her eye. Her mother had once again taken it upon herself to lie out Lily's outfit for the day. One of the few downsides to going away to school is that when she was at home her mother was sickly doting.

"Mum! I'm too old for you to pick out my clothes," Lily sighed, as her mum turned the corner carrying freshly laundered undergarments.

"Well I'm afraid if I don't do it, you never will, and I don't think the Potters would appreciate it if you showed up in your knickers," she teased throwing a pair at her daughter.

The younger red head blushed and looked quickly away from her mum. While Lily had inherited Mrs. Evan's red locks, she ended up with a smooth silky texture, while her mothers was full of curls.

"Whatever, Mum it's brunch, they have it every year, and I've never worn a dress before, do you really think this is necessary?"

"Well don't you want to look nice, Lily?" Mrs. Evans replied, with a bit of a smirk.

Lily blushed again, her mother was more intuitive than she had expected.

Lily begrudgingly put the dress on to avoid a fight with her mum on her short and far between visits home. Of course it fit like a dream despite her absence from home majority of the year.

She stood in front of her full length mirror, and for once wished she was back at Hogwarts, so the mirror there could throw a compliment her way and give her a little confidence boost. She turned sideways and puffed out her chest in the hope of giving the illusion of having a larger bust. She held her breath like that for a second longer before exhaling loudly and going downstairs.

The Potter family had an annual Easter brunch every year, and this year was no exception. James and Lily were home for a bit of a long weekend to be with family, but brunch was about all the Easter celebrating either of the families did. When Mrs. Evans and Lily arrived at Brunch, the familiar brunch guest's eyes turned towards them. Lily couldn't help but feel like they weren't looking at her like they normally did, but judging by their surprised faces, were acknowledging how much she had grown up since last Easter.

The women present quickly surrounded Mrs. Evans and Lily to greet them. Lily felt as though she was naked and being poked with 3 different probity probes. She heard plenty of "how beautiful she's becoming" and "what a lovely young woman she is now". Lily desperately searched with her eyes until she found James and made her escape.

Lily and James shared their own table at every get together like this; 'the kiddy table', Lily had told James muggles call it. Petunia would certainly have shared the table with them as well, if she had ever accepted an invitation to the Potters home. Even Lily's father had grown more bitter since first discovering what Lily and the Potters really were. Lily suspected however, that it had more to do with his precious baby being gone almost all the time than anything else.

"I wonder how old we have to be to sit at the 'adult' table?" James asked Lily while scooping some egg bake onto his plate.

"I don't mind it really, do you want to sit with them? I was just bombarded with comments about my womanhood incase you missed that," Lily reminded him.

In all honesty, Lily loved having sharing a table with James, whenever she talked to him in front of adults she always felt like an idiot. They were at that age when they talked to each other people assumed one of them had a crush on each other. Almost fourth years, and Lily still hadn't had a boyfriend.

"Ugh, I always feel stupid being the first one to stand up after a meal, I feel like that makes me responsible for clearing the table or something," Lily mumbled, leaning back, thinking of the way it is when she's back at home from school.

"Why do they always sit around the table an hour after they eat?" she added.

"Well why do it when we have house elves?" James grinned back.

"Oh right. I forgot," she mumbled, embarrassed back. The Potters relied heavily on their two house elves. James parents were much older than Lily's and were getting on a bit.

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Lily lay awake in her bed for hours. There was simply nothing to do when she was at home. She longed to do magic like at school, but settle for turning in early.

While she lay awake she thought over the day. She was sure James would have taken notice of her, everyone else did. All he ever saw her in was her school uniform, and she pranced right into his house with a dress on and she was sure she was just 'Lily from down the street' still. She sighed and rolled onto her side, knowing that sleep would be evading her for sometime.

"tap" "tap, tap"

Lily stopped breathing as to listen closely to the noise. Oh if only she could use her wand! She slowly crept to the window and threw it open. She dodged just in time to avoid being hit in the head with a pebble.

"James Potter, what are you doing?"

"Lily let me in, I can't sleep alone!"

"Coming from an only child," she whispered back.

"Your parents love me," he stated, as an ending to the argument.

"My Dad would kill you!" she corrected him.

"I could take him," he smirked, confidently.

"James!"

While Lily was away this year Petunia had snuck a boy into her room late at night and got caught. Apparently Lily missed quite a shout down. But now of course, James fell into the category of 'no boys in the girls rooms' rule that has been laid down. Add that to the tally of 'Why Petunia Sucks at Life List'.

"Fine come out here and we will just hang out for a while, I know you weren't sleeping either."

He had her, normally Lily wouldn't have even thought about it, but it was James, he wouldn't let her get in trouble.

"Ugh, I'll be down in a second."

She pulled on a jumper over her tank top and climbed out the window. Thanking Merlin she slept on the first floor.

"How come you always get your way?" she asked, as she straightened out.

"Because you're my best friend, you can't say no to me."

Lily felt a jolt in her stomach at his words. Certainly they were no longer best friends. They both had become more involved with friends of their own sex since starting school. However, she couldn't deny her weakness for him.

James pulled Lily out of her thought process with, "C'mon let's go fly."

"I-I've never just gone f-flying before, don't be ridiculous," she replied, blushing.

"Lily, you think I only have one broom?" he rolled his eyes at her as if it was common knowledge he had multiple brooms.

"Here," he tossed her a spare broom she had failed to notice before.

Lily's face held a look of shock, and she simply starred at James, and waited for him to tell her he was joking. Eventually he suggested that she just ride along on his broom.

James then scooped Lily up and held her tight in front of him on his broom. It was to his advantage he had gained some inches on her, he could steer right around her.

Lily mean while was concentrating on squeezing her stomach muscles and hoping she didn't vomit with everything she had. Surely if she did, it would back lash onto poor James.

After flying for a while James brought them down next to a lake. Lily hadn't realized it, but her eyes had been shut from the moment James threw her onto his broom.

"James… I think I'm afraid of heights…"

James just chuckled and added, "Ha I think you're right you better sit for a while."

Lily was already sitting, she pretty much collapsed the moment they landed and James relinquished his hold on her.

The lake was beautiful, Lily wondered where they were, but could not bring herself to break the silence. It was a perfect moment and she was not about to ruin it.

Finally after admiring the lake for some time Lily decided the stars deserved some appreciation too, so she leaned back, and without being fully aware, reached out and laced her fingers in James' hands and pulled him down so he was laying next to her. James responded by enclosing her entire hand into his.

It was James that finally broke the silence.

"You know you looked really nice today Lily... I mean it, I know you think I didn't notice," he said, as he leaned in closer.

"Thanks, I…" But she couldn't bring myself to finish the sentence. Her James was practically begging her to kiss him. When exactly had he become what he is to her now? She wished she could pin point the moment.

"Lily…" James said her name so softly she could barely hear it. Then he slipped his arm under her and their lips met. They kissed for a moment or two before he slowly pulled away from her. They both looked at each other with the same dumbfounded look of their first kiss.

"I'm sorry I..." but he never finished. Lily leaned in again and pressed into him, kissing him a little fiercer this time.

James tightened his hold on her and she slipped her hand up his shoulder to his neck. When they broke apart we just looked at each other for a few moments. Just as they had when they were kids, the look said everything, and no words were needed.

James then slipped his arm around her waist and Lily leaned her head onto his shoulder. They looked at the lake for a bit longer, both reflecting on their first kiss. James was thinking more about when the next time he would be able to do it again.

The time eventually came to_ fly_ back home. They flew straight into Lily's room through the open window. When they landed, James planted a soft peck on Lily's cheek, smiled a bit sheepishly and flew out quickly.

Lily fell back onto her bed smiling. She had fancied James since she became interested in boys, but then again, so did every other simply couldn't believe her good fortune, that they would share their first kiss together. Hopefully it was just the beginning of firsts they would share.

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The next day the ride on the Hogwarts Express did not go as Lily had imagined it would. As usual she rode with Jaci and James to Kings Cross, since her mum couldn't see her off on the train anyways.

James, Peter, Judith, and Lily shared a compartment. They were the only ones of Gryffindors their year that ever went home on the long weekend. She had planned on spilling everything to Judith, but she didn't seem interested in anything Lily had to say. She was busy throwing googly eyes at James and Lily couldn't help noticing that he wasn't returning the same looks. She took immediate pride in that _maybe James really liked me._

Lily then started silently competing with Judith for attention from James, so far Lily was the clear winner. Her and James kept making eye contact then one of them would look away blushing at being caught looking at the other. Eventually Judith caught on and gave up, but she wasn't the only one who noticed. Peter began shooting Lily looks that could almost be mistaken for a glare, but she shrugged it off.

Her and James continued stealing glances at each other and every once in a while he would sneak and squeeze my knee playfully while she played wizards chess with Jude. She couldn't help but notice though that all of Peter's nasty looks were reserved for her, and they were growing more and more frequent as the train ride went on.

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**A/N:** This is the re-written version of chapter 2. I hope everyone finds it a better read.

-Mplsveela.


	3. Scurry Away

Same Disclaimers Apply. My Plot, Not my World.

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Chapter 3: Scurry Away

Lily awoke way too early for a Saturday, but decided to get out of bed anyways. She walked over to the mirror, put her hair into a pony, threw on some sweat pants and an oversized Gryffindor t-shirt that she stole from James last summer.

She set off for the great hall by herself; she preferred to be alone lately anyways. Everything had been so different since they got back from their long Easter weekend. She felt stupid for thinking James might be interested in her after they shared that kiss. They hardly talked since the night, and yet Lily still caught him looking at her. This fact kept her on her toes, and hope in her heart.

To further confuse Lily, the Marauders had begun laughing at her in her face. She had always got along fine with them, but she had become the butt of all of their jokes since they had gotten back. She considered herself a smart girl, and she recognized foul play when she saw it.

Earlier that week they had been particularly cruel, and she didn't know how to even properly react to the change.

_Lily walked out of History of Magic with Judith on her heals, both relieved to be done with the most boring class at Hogwarts._

_The red head tilted her head back at Judith as they entered the corridor, "Finally, I swear that class gets longer - OUCH!"_

_Lily fell back onto her butt after walking right into someone. It was her fault; walking forward, head backward. Not a coordinated combination. _

"_Oh drat... Sorry," she murmured, looking up to the person she had walked into, but whomever it was clearly did not take notice and was down the corridor already. She started picking up my books as Judith began giggling at the predicament._

"_Smooth… real smooth Lily," she somehow got out between laughs. _

"_Oh shut it! Its your fault you know, I was turning around to talk to you." _

_Lily was picking herself up off the ground when she felt a hand push down on her shoulder forcing her back to the ground. _

"_Bloody hell," she said, harshly. She then pushed herself up off the ground very quickly trying to maintain her pride. She looked around to see who had pushed her and saw the backs of the four Marauders walking away and a distinctive high five exchange._

"_Are you okay?" Judith asked her. Lily just shook her head and pushed her silky hair out of her face._

"_I have no idea…"_

Lily pushed the heavy doors of the Great Hall open and her eyes verified her suspicions. There couldn't have been more than ten people at each house table; it was much too early for breakfast. She made her way to the Gryffindor house table, and without realizing it her feet brought her to a familiar head of messy black hair. She observed that he, Peter and Sirius looked like absolute hell. If she didn't know better, she'd wager they hadn't even been to bed. She let her curiosity get the better of her and she addressed them.

"Where's Remus?

They hardly ever left each other's sides. They moved as a pack, pulling pranks on innocent victims and having complete disregard for the rules. And now apparently, they pulled all nighters doing Merlin knows what. She had even made the mistake of addressing them offhandedly as "a bunch of little marauders," earlier this year, and it stuck.

"Since when do you care so much about Remus?" James asked, without lifting his head from his folded arms.

Lily had no response and stopped next to Sirius, across from Peter and stepped over the bench to sit down. When her butt was about to make contact with the seat however, she hit the ground instead.

She instantly heard laughter. It was dull laughter, as they seemed too tired to even give their prank proper recognition, but it stung all the same. She stood up trying to act as though the bench vanishing under her didn't faze her. Her blushing face certainly would have given her away if any of them were looking at her. James still had not even lifted his head.

She went to the other side of Sirius and again stepped over the bench, and again humiliatingly hit the ground. She stood up so quick you would have thought the floor was on fire. She stared at them trying to fight the tears of her humiliation and frustration that had been building all week. She stared at James bent head willing him to look up and scold his friends.

"Sorry Lily, but your not welcome on that side of me either. Why don't you just _scurry _away," Sirius hissed at her tauntingly with a nasty smirk on his face.

Lily was glued to the floor out of shock. She openly stared at Sirius now, and he stared back. She wished she knew occlumency so she could figure out what was going on. While her and Sirius were having their stare down, James took his opportunity to look up. The look on Lily's face was one he never wanted to see again, and he quickly put his head back down before she could notice. If those penetrating green eyes had had the chance to meet his, he would have been undone.

Lily was eventually the one to break their eye contact, she took one last chance catching James' eye, but he still had his head down. Maybe he was sleeping? She thought to herself, she could give him the benefit of the doubt. Maybe Sirius was being such a jerk because they had such a rough night, or she assumed they did by the looks of them.

She walked back to Gryffindor tower shaking, and running through every possibility in her head. She was humiliated, that was for sure, she couldn't think of anything that would make James hate her so, or let his friends walk all over her. What was going on? She let her mind linger on the idea it was because she was a muggleborn, Sirius, she knew was pureblood, maybe he was finally owning up to it. But James was pureblood, and he would never harvest those sorts of feelings.

Lily went straight up to the 3rd year girl's dormitory and stopped in front of the mirror. Her face was still very flushed and she could feel her pulse in her temples.

"Well?" Lily whispered harshly to the mirror.

"No comment," the mirror quipped back.

She looked around the room and saw that all the bed's curtains were still drawn. She sighed loudly and decided to crawl back into her own bed to collect her thoughts.

Lily looked over at her best friend's bed for a second before pulling her curtains around herself. They had been best friends since before they were even sorted. They were both muggle borns, and always felt that that gave them a special bond.

_Jaci Potter relinquished her tight hold she had on me, but kept her hands firmly on my shoulders. "Lily, I'm so proud of you, you will make an amazing witch." She then paused as though she were holding something back, "Take care of James."_

_Lily nodded, but James interjected, "More like I should take care of Lily! Like usual I might add," he said nudging Lily out of the way to get a hug from his own Mum._

"_We better get going if we want to find a compartment," James said. _

_Lily linked her hand around James' arm so they wouldn't lose eachother as he pushed through the crowd the best he could._ _Small first years like them could easily be lost amongst the sea of wizards and witches of every shape and size on their way to Hogwarts. Glancing in the windows of every compartment, they finally stopped at one that had three_ _boys in it about their own age. _

_The moment James slid open the door to see if they could join, regret was visible in his eyes. _

"_Oh erm, excuse us," James stammered a bit, moving to slide the door shut. _

"_Oi, What is it Potter?" A blonde boy interrupted. _

"_Thought there might be room in here for a mud blood and a blood traitor like yourself?" He quickly added. _

_Lily shifted about uncomfortably at the boy's tone. She had never heard those terms, but James certainly had. She tugged James elbow that she was still holding, "C'mon we have to find somewhere to sit."_

_But to her surprise James stepped forward, and Lily not wanting to follow let go of his arm. She was left standing a step outside the door, and he a step inside, but the distance easily felt like a mile._

"_Lets get something straight Malfoy, you are the embarrassment to pure bloods, not I," James said very sternly, but through his teeth. _

_Lily was so absorbed in the interaction James was having with the stuck up boy that she even didn't notice a girl standing right next to her. She was about the same height and size as herself and was probably a first year as well. She turned her head and their eyes met, she managed a small smile, and then they both tore their eyes from each other and looked back into the compartment. _

_The blonde boy had his wand out, "Are you man enough to back your words up there Potter?" James made to grab his wand when the girl next to Lily piped up. _

"_Oh please don't!" She pleaded and looked very worried. _

_Malfoy looked over James' shoulder at the girl standing next to Lily and she suddenly linked her arm into Lily's. Without thinking, Lily folded her arm up and they squeezed their arms together, something they would come to do at Hogwarts all the time._

"_What's this? You have a mud blood fan club Potter?" He started to walk around James towards the two girls, and they both took a step back, involuntarily. _

_James stuck his foot out and tripped Malfoy so he fell flat on his face, then stepped over him and slammed the door shut. He walked straight to the new girl and put his hands on her shoulders, looked her straight in the eyes and asked her if she was a muggle born. They had no idea how this would effect them,_ _that they would be treated like dirt by their 'superior' peers. _

_She nodded, clearly intimidated, then he looked at Lily with his big sad eyes._

_C'mon, you can sit with us, I have some things to tell you both." _

_(end flashback)_

Lily smiled as she thought about it, even though it was the first time either of them were called mudbloods, it was what brought her and Judith together. She firmly believed that the encounter on the train, and the talk James' gave them in preparation made the world of a difference. It forced them to put their guards up, and be strong and brave, if none of it had happened, they might not be Gryffindors.

They had finally found a compartment with one boy in it, and James explained to them about pure bloods and what "mudblood" meant. He said they had to ignore anyone that called them that, and not let anyone get to them. He said that all purebloods had a choice whether to live with old prejudice, or rise above it, much like his own family. Lily and Judith had held onto each other the whole time and after they introduce themselves, had declared themselves best friends. The other boy in the compartment introduced himself to James, and they quickly became best friends as well. James would later explain to Lily that it was his speech in the compartment, that Sirius credited towards him being the first Black to be sorted into Gryffindor.

Lily sighed at the reminiscent, and she wished things could be simple like that once more, when her curtains were abruptly thrown open to reveal a beaming Judith.

"Good, you're up!" she said, brightly.

"I was up!" Lily said, squinting at the bright light.

"Oh okay, Lily," she said, rolling her eyes walking back to her own bed.

"And why are you so cheery this beautiful Saturday morning?"

"… You've GOT to be joking right? We've only been looking forward to today for the past two months."

When Lily didn't respond right away, Judith sighed and collapsed on top of Lily in exasperation.

"Lily! Hogsmeade… Does that ring a bell?"

"OH!" she said, giggling under her friend's added weight.

"I'm sorry! I must have forgot."

"Okay since I'm almost ready, I am going to go down to the common room, I'll wait for you though, so hurry up will ya?"

"Yes Mum," Lily said, retreating to take a shower.

After a long shower, and changing her hair a dozen times, she ended up just putting it in a tight high ponytail with a huff.

Upon making her way down to the common room she spotted Judith sitting with Janet, their other dorm mate, and Jude shot Lily an apologetic glance.

"Great."

"Oi! We missed breakfast! What took you so long Lils?" Judith asked.

"Sorry we'll just get something in town, my treat. Let's just go down."

They got up and headed towards the portrait hole, but Lily couldn't help over hearing the Marauders who were seated close by.

"She was getting ready that whole time?"

"I didn't think it was possible, but I think she maybe looks worse than she did this morning when she just woke up."

"Missed breakfast? I guess she just couldn't find anywhere to _sit_."

Lily did her best to pretend like she couldn't hear them, but she could feel her ears getting hot, and she knew her face was probably the color of her hair by now.

Once they were on their own, Lily let her guard down and turned to the other two girls, "Do I really look that bad?"

"Oh Lily you know they just won't let that stupid mouse thing go. They seem to bring it up every opportunity they get, don't they?" Janet responded, with no hint of sincerity in her voice.

Lily felt her stomach drop. The joke really was on her, they were going behind her back, and this was no ordinary teasing.

"Um I actually have no idea what you are talking about. What about did you say about mice?" She asked very unsteadily.

"Oh you know, they think you resemble a rodent and they just like to make mouse comments whenever they get the chance to."

Lily turned to Judith, "How come you never told me Jude?"

"I thought you knew. They aren't very discrete anymore. Peter started it on the train back from long break. Don't you remember?" she asked, concerned.

Lily looked her in the eye while told herself she wouldn't cry. Then she looked over to Janet, and she suddenly felt like she was going to be sick. This had been going on for nearly two months, and neither girl warned her.

"I… I'm sorry I beg your pardon?" She asked, hoping there was some sort of misunderstanding.

Jude scooted closer to her in their carriage and kept an uncomfortable amount of eye contact with Lily. To an outsider it looked more like Lily was being stared at rather than comforted.

She slipped an arm around Lily's shoulder and opened her mouth to say something. Lily would have liked to think she was going to explain everything a bit nicer, but Janet spoke first.

"Oh come off it, drama queen. They just think you're a bit annoying and a bit of a 'know it all'. They probably just decided to point out your flaws to knock you off your high horse."

Just as she finished the carriage stopped and she climbed out as if it were just any other Hogsmeade trip. For her it probably was, but Lily couldn't figure out what was bothering her more; that the boys teased her behind my back, (and to her face starting this week), or that her friends kept it from her and blew it off when she found out.

Her guard was officially up and with reinforcements. Judith was her best friend, how could she keep this from her? She was a never great friend with Janet; she was like the Peter to Lily and Judith. She was their dorm mate, and she was always just there mostly because Judith took her in, but Lily never expected her to be this cold.

Judith pulled Lily out of her thoughts by tugging her on her elbow on their way out of the carriage.

"C'mon, let's go, you owe me breakfast."

Lily managed a small smile, this approach could work, and distraction was the right road to take today. They walked to Miss. Puddyfoots, and had probably the most pathetic breakfasts ever. All that was offered for breakfast food was a few teacakes.

None of them mentioned what happened that morning, but Lily couldn't shake it off. She couldn't stop going over the fact that she was being compared to a bloody rodent. She had always thought she was pretty; she had long shiny red hair that fell beyond her shoulders. She had bright emerald eyes, which stood out against her clear porcelain skin. This year she had even started wearing a little bit of make up. She supposed her teeth were a little on the large size, but she didn't think it was enough for her to be more rodent than human. She made a mental note to spend sometime in front of the mirror tonight.

After their very pitiful breakfast they headed out to their normal stops in Hogsmeade. Lily wasn't really in the mood for shopping anymore, and didn't buy anything at all. She just tagged along with Jude and Janet.

She finally made her one and only purchase of the day when she bought some owl treats for her beautiful own, Wilma. She was an Eastern Screech Owl, but she never grew out of her red phase. So she named her after her favorite cartoon character from when she lived her muggle life. Just thinking of her owl made her cheer up a bit. She had been a gift from the Potters for Christmas during her first year. James had picked her out because Wilma's red feathers had reminded him of her.

She picked up a few packages and made her way to pay when Sirius literally appeared out of nowhere, and snatched the owl treats out of Lily's hands. She was in no mood to play keep away however, and she quickly summoned them back and continued to the register. Sirius, however, was choosing to be a pest like usual.

"Lily _my pet,_ aren't you forgetting anything?"

Lily chose to humor him, "No I think I've got everything, thank you Sirius," and started walking around him since he had planted himself between her and her destination.

"No, I really don't think you do."

"Excuse me, please let me pass."

"I speak on behalf of the Marauders, and we think you are in dire need of some DeCon rather than some owl treats."

The color in her face vividly changed. Only this time instead of blushing, she pigment fell white.

Decon? Decon was muggle rat poison, she recalled telling James about it when he had come to the market with her and her Mum a few years ago when they had a mice problem in the basement. None of the Marauders knew a lick about muggles, so James must have told them to use it against me.

"Excuse me?"

"We think you should go eat DeCon," Sirius said, inches from her face.

Then the sound of a slap stopped the entire store. Lily had never slapped someone before, and she wished she had hit him with a little more force.

A smile played with the corners of his mouth, they had gotten what they wanted, and they had finally gotten a rise out of her. She glanced around and saw James glaring at her, with his arms folded across his chest. She suddenly felt something that was close to hyperventilation. The color began returning to her cheeks and she didn't know whether she was humiliated, insulted, hurt, betrayed or ashamed.

She quickly dropped her owl treats and turned and sped walked through the door. As she rounded the corner she smacked chest to chest into Becky. She was ahead of Lily in the same house, and they had always been friendly. But maybe not friendly enough for Lily to throw her arms around Becky in a hug, which is what she did.

Perhaps Becky could just sense Lily needed a friend, because she immediately hugged her back. They were quite the pair to see, Lily was at least four inches taller than Beck, but it didn't seem to matter to either of the girls.

"I'm so sorry, I'm just having a rough morning," Lily managed to get out.

"Lily, don't apologize, I was just heading back to the castle, want to join me? You can tell me about it on the way?"

So she did just that, she confided everything that has happened in the past two months to her and she listened.

As they ascended the girls dormitory stairs Lily just walked straight past her own 3rd year door and joined her in the 4th year dorms instead.

"Wow" she said, as she fell back onto her bed, 4th years and up had slightly bigger beds than 1st through 3rd years, a seniority thing.

"I don't know what to tell you, it's so bizarre, but I can see where it would upset you. I can't believe Judith and Janet never said anything to you, or followed you out when you ran out," Becky said, joining Lily on her own bed.

"I know! I never have breakdowns. If I were them I would have gone into panic mode when I saw my usually calm and collective friend have a public break down."

"Want to hear something that has been bothering me since I kissed James?"

With a nod from Becky, Lily pressed on, "James told me he had never snogged a girl before me, but Judith claimed that they had earlier this year, so one of my friends is lying, and for some reason, even though James is being a total prat, I still think he is the one telling the truth."

"Lils, they most definitely did NOT snog. He's not stupid, she puts on her fake I'm nice to everyone attitude whenever he's around, but I know they have never snogged."

This reassurance perked Lily up a bit, for some reason the idea of James dating Judith made her stomach turn.

The two eventually fell asleep on Becky's bed after talking about everything from quidditch to herbology. When Lily woke it was late enough that she slipped down into her own dorm and into her bed. She conjured a hand mirror to have a good look at her face like she had promised herself earlier. 'Lumos', she shined her wand on her face and looked for every, if any, mouse features she could contain.

She supposed she had been pulling her hair back pretty tight when she wears it in a pony. She made a mental note to wear it looser when it was up. Her nose was almost always pink, and was a bit pointier than she liked. Maybe that's where they got their inspiration?

"Bugger," she said to herself. She wished she had bought some new powder while in Hogsmeade, now she would have to mail order some.

Her teeth were an issue on their own, but what was she supposed to do about it? Her Mum always said that she would grow into them, but she was still waiting for that triumphant turn in her physical life.

Maybe she was sitting on a high horse, she had always thought she was pretty, but how did she not notice all these flaws before? Her Mum was always showering her with compliments when she was home, so it was easy to place the blame on her praise. But then again, she could use this to her advantage. If Debra Evans was good at anything, it was her keen eye for knowing what worked for people. She would gladly give Lily a makeover.

She whispered, 'knox', and rolled over. Only a few weeks left until summer. A summer with James and the Marauders down the street, no Jude or Janet, and a whole lot of Petunia.

* * *

**A/N:** This was the hardest chapter to rewrite so far. (And it was only chapter 3!) Hopefully I will be able to move through the next chapters a little quicker. Let me know what you think! : )


	4. Confidence is Key

Same Disclaimers Apply. My Plot, Not my World.

* * *

Chapter 4: Confidence is Key

* * *

"Honestly, Mum, they are not teasing me because they like me. That is such a 'Mum' thing to say, your losing your touch," Lily told her mother dryly.

Mrs. Evans sighed, and joined Lily on her bed that her daughter was splayed across. Taking her hand she said, "Lily, they will grow out of it, I promise. I was fourteen once, believe it or not, and muggle teenage boys are the same as wizard teenagers. Well except the whole making the bench vanish thing."

Lily laughed; it was the first genuine laugh that had escaped her since she started retelling her woes from school. When she had got home this morning she had begun by telling her mum about everything between the Marauders and her.

"See that is exactly my point, when a boy likes a girl he doesn't normally knock her to the ground repeatedly and tell her to poison herself."

Mrs. Evans pondered this for a moment.

"Listen, your at the age when boys and girls begin to have a strong attraction, to each other. When a 14 year old boy's heart tells him he should be giving a special someone more attention, he doesn't know how to handle it. All he knows is he wants that special someone to notice him as much as possible, and what better way than to tease them or play little pranks on them."

Lily just stared at her, and then fell back onto the bed in frustration. They are not teasing her because they have a crush on her; her mother was being so naïve.

"Well I'm going out, you want to come Lils?" her Mum said as she sprayed herself with perfume.

"No, I'm tired, too much traveling today I suppose," she responded, without even opening her eyes.

Debra Evans was a compulsive shopper she went almost daily. It wasn't that the Evans had a lot of money, but her mum liked to keep up with trends, and she was the best bargain shopper in this part of the country. Lily couldn't even remember the last time she went, she usually just got in the way. Her mum brought stuff home for her and Petunia constantly.

Mrs. Evans then called out to Petunia to go along, and Lily was thankful when she heard her sister accept. She just wanted some peace and quiet on her first night back.

After she heard them leave she made her way downstairs and plopped down on the sofa. Her dad usually got home late from work, so she decided she would wait around until he arrived.

That never happened though as she fell asleep almost instantly after laying down.

The next thing she knew, she was waking up in her own bed, and it was morning. She smiled to herself. Her dad must have carried her back to her room when he got home.

She walked out and stumbled over some shopping bags, her mum pulled through after all. Deciding she would rummage through them later, she made her way to the kitchen.

It felt odd making herself breakfast, but it was 7 am, and what else was she going to do?

"Lily, get up swee- Oh! Your up," her mum said, startled.

"Mmm," was all Lily managed with her mouth full?

"What's that?" she asked, pointing at the waffle in front of her.

Lily didn't respond verbally, but looked at her and raised an eyebrow. Obviously it was a waffle, and obviously she was about to eat it, hence the fork in her hand.

"Well I was thinking about what you said yesterday about the whole image makeover thing, and I am going to assume that includes what you eat."

Again Lily didn't respond verbally but instead raised her other eyebrow so they were both somewhere in her hairline.

"Mum, I don't want to sound conceited, but I do not need to lose weight. That is one thing I'm completely satisfied with."

"I understand that sweetie, but you're creating eating habits that will come back and bite you in the bum later on. You may be skinny now, but you'll start filling out and you don't want to gain weight in the wrong spots if you know what I mean." She finished and went to start making tea.

"Meh, I will worry about it when the time comes."

Just to shove it in her face, Lily then poured maple syrup all over her waffle and cut herself a huge bite, looked at her mum, and devoured it.

She did want a make over, but she was thinking something more along the lines of a new wardrobe, hairstyle and maybe even a tan. Oh, and definitely some new found confidence.

She finished her waffle just as her father walked into the kitchen, and she got up and ran into his arms.

"Thank you for bringing me to my room last night Dad!" she squealed.

"Its good to see you too darling, but I couldn't carry you too your room even if I wanted to, you know I have a bad back," He responded hugging his youngest daughter and lifting her off the ground slightly.

"Oh?" Lily asked, pulling away from his embrace, " How did I get there then?"

"James carried you." He answered like it was as simple as 'what color is the sky? 'Blue.'"

"I beg your pardon?" Lily asked flabbergast.

"Well he said something about not being able to use his wand, so he needed a flashlight and they didn't own muggle things like that, so he came to borrow one."

"When he saw you sprawled out on the couch he offered to bring you to your room, he must have saw how uncomfortable I was, since you were in my spot," he told Lily, narrowing his eyes playfully.

Lily hardly took notice of this; in her mind she was playing the image of James bringing her to her bed a million times.

"What the hell are you laughing at?" Petunia shot at Lily one day the next week.

Lily glanced up from the 'so sweet it makes you sick' love scene she was reading, and threw her sister's trashy romance novel at her so it hit her in the stomach.

"Why you prat! Why do you always have to touch my things?" she said disgusted, wiping off the cover of the book on her beach towel as if trying to wipe off 'magic germs'.

"I couldn't help it, I've never seen you so concentrated on something in my entire life. Trying to pick up some tips then?" Lily said to her with a smirk. She was lying on my stomach out on their porch trying to get some sun. She propped herself up on her elbows so she could get a better view of her sister's reaction.

She just looked at her for a second, and then said, "Lily, I don't know why you bother, we both know you'll never get remotely tan. You have red hair for heavens sake. Get it through your head." She then turned around to lie out her towel to get some sun herself.

She's always saying things like that, but Lily had only been home from school a week and half and already had a very nice base tan with some undesired tan lines. Her skin wasn't as sensitive as most red heads and she actually tanned very well.

Speaking of red heads however, Lily and her Mum had gone to a muggle salon and had Lily's hair dyed a deep dark red. She had to admit; she looked older, and more sophisticated. She didn't get it trimmed like normal though; she decided she wanted to grow it out nice and long. She was hoping to get it to at least her elbows, and if it doesn't reach there by the time school starts, Becky reassured her she knew a spell.

She stood up to go inside, there simply wasn't enough room for both Lily and Petunia's ego. She was already indulged in her trashy novel, and didn't even take notice when Lily stood.

She began wiping herself down trying to get the combination of sweat and tanning oil off of her body before she returned inside. She scooped up the rest of her things when she heard a bark like laugh.

She turned around faster than she could blink. James and Sirius were on the side street that ran past the side of her house. James was standing there looking at her, while Sirius was double over in laughter.

She shot James the worst glare that she could manage. If she chose to tan in her own back yard she should be able to do so without ridicule. She thought the summer would be painless.

**: James's POV:**

James stopped listening to Sirius's ramblings when something red caught his eye. He turned and looked as Lily stood up in a little green bikini.

"Whoa, get a hold of Evans," Sirius whistled, following his best mate's eyes.

"What is she doing?" he added.

"Sunbathing, it's a muggle thing," James responded, without taking his eyes of Lily.

"I wish girls at Hogwarts sunbathed," Sirius replied slack jawed. If James had taken his eyes off of the bikini clad Lily, he would have seen his friends face mirrored his own. Sirius will never admit it, but this moment is attributed to the many muggle posters that would come to adorn his wall at his parents.

Sirius then let out a bark like laugh at their predicament. James however was thinking back to the kiss they had shared that spring, and how much he wished he could relive it.

But all of a sudden she snapped her head to them and pulled them both out of their reverie. James received a serious death glare from her before she stormed back into her house.

"Man," Sirius said, wiping a tear from his eye and slapping James on the back, "Close your mouth before you start catching bugs with it."

James shook his head to clear it, and tried to give him his best smile.

"Well, the next three weeks should be interesting, we need to start thinking of some pranks to pull on Evans. Hey, do you think she would ever snog me?" Sirius asked casually.

"Don't count on it mate, I don't think girls like being told to poison themselves," James answered, but even as he said it he felt a roar inside of him that wanted to knock his lights out for even thinking about it. He had been so excited to tell the guys about him and Lily. He thought they would be pleased for him. But at that exact time they had gone bi polar towards her, and rather than go against his best mates, he sat back and watched her get hurt. He stood there and thought about how lucky he would be if she would ever talk to him again as Sirius put an arm around him to steer them back to the Potters.

**: End James's POV:**

"Petunia who is it?" Lily yelled from the kitchen. The doorbell had rung and Petunia had lost in a fair game of rock, paper, scissors to answer it.

She looked up to see James entering the kitchen with a flashlight in his hands.

"Oh, come to laugh at me again? Where's your other half?" Lily hissed as he walked towards the counter she was leaning on. She suddenly became aware that there was a very nice view down her shirt as she was leaned over the counter and stood up to her full potential.

"Um, if you mean Sirius, he is at my house, he is, erm, staying with us. And I don't know what you're referring to about laughing."

"You don't? Which time would you like to be reminded about?

"This particular time I am referring to was 3 days ago when I was tanning on my porch," She said, crossing her arms, and leaning towards him, threatening him to contradict her.

"Lily I wasn't laughing at you, Sirius was laughing at me because I was staring at you," He finished, blushing. Lily couldn't believe he was openly embarrassed about that admittance, but didn't show any sign of embarrassment when his best friends told her to poison herself.

He took another step forward and made her breath hitch as the gap between them became smaller. He set a big yellow and black flashlight on the counter.

"Tell your dad I returned this?" he asked.

Lily nodded and when he turned to go she spoke up without thinking, "Well I guess I'm just going to have to ask Sirius about what exactly he was laughing about aren't I?"

She was as surprised at her outburst as he was, but there was no turning back now. She walked forward and passed him leading the way to the front door and over to his house.

They set off in silence and she was taken back that James wasn't putting up any sort of fight about it. Once they got right up to his drive however, he spoke up.

"Honestly, I wasn't lying, he's just going to confirm what I already told you. You're wasting your time."

"Why do you care what I do with my time?"

"I don't, I'm just stating what's going to happen, and this is pointless."

"What are you trying to hide from me?" She asked.

"Nothing I'm just saying."

"Maybe you just don't want me coming over to your house then? Wouldn't want a filthy rodent like me 'scurrying' all over, eh?" She had stopped walking at some point and they were right in front of his house. She had not meant to call him out like that, but all the resentment that she had been feeling towards him just burst forth without her control. Luckily she didn't have her wand on her.

James' look changed from anger to one of discomfort. His eyebrows relaxed and went back to their normal spot. He never took his eyes off of hers and it made her a bit uneasy, so that she had to look away. When the silence had gone on long enough without him breaking it, she turned and started up his driveway, but he took a hold of her arm and turned her around to face him.

"Lily," James began, but paused as he struggled with his words, "We weren't serious, after you left Hogsmeade," again he paused, and Lily was about to interject but he began before she could, "well it was the biggest fight Sirius and I have ever had. It got pretty heated, a shield charm had to be cast between us."

"You weren't serious? I sure as hell couldn't tell! I didn't get so much as a 'Just kidding'. I have never felt more like dirt in my entire life. I thought we were all friends."

"That's it, I thought they were just teasing you, but when I saw you and Sirius interact I realized he wasn't just teasing you, and you were taking it worse than we realized.

"That's when I decided to interject, it's a damn bit harder standing up to your best mates than you realize Lily," James added in his defense.

"Ya," Lily said, sadly, holding back tears, "I guess it's too hard to stick up _for_ them too."

She turned dejectedly away from James, and was pleased he didn't stop her again. What great qualities her friends had. The girls chose to leave her in the dark all term; James didn't stick up for her until the last moment. She felt her heart lift at his admittance however. There was some hope of repairing the damage.

She walked into her house to find her mum smiling at her with a pile of shopping bags at her feet. Lily gladly welcomed the distraction. Lily had quickly developed a style by sorting through the things her mum brought home. Now her mum shopped based on Lily's sorting, and she rarely brought home something that didn't work.

Two days later, Lily was lying out on her porch, like she did most every sunny day. She was drifting in and out of sleep lazily, when the sun became completely obscured. She squinted her right eye open to see if it was getting cloudy, but instead saw Sirius standing right in front of her lounge chair.

She yelped, and tried to quickly cover up her exposed body.

"Sirius, what are you doing?" she half shriek, out of unexplained panic.

Sirius let out his signature laugh and tossed a towel at her. She quickly gathered it around her body, and sat up in her chair. He proceeded to take a seat next to her uninvited.

"You have nothing to be embarrassed about Evans, you look hot as hell in a bikini," he said with a smirk plastered on his face.

"Um, thanks," Lily replied, not encouraging conversation.

"C'mon, put something on, lets go for a walk," he demanded, standing up.

"A walk? Why would I want to go on a walk with you?" Lily spat at him suddenly.

He sighed, "James told me I should talk to you about this past year. If you will give me the time I can explain, I don't expect you to forgive me, but maybe it will make you feel a bit better."

Lily spoke before her brain had made a decision. They were to meet at the corner in five minutes, and she went into her bedroom to change. With a look in the mirror she saw her make up free face, and her messy hair piled on top of her head. There was nothing she could do with her remaining 4 minutes, so throwing on some more appropriate clothes she went to the strange meeting she had agreed to.

"Confidence," Lily whispered to herself, pulling on her shirt self-consciously.

A half hour later, Lily re-entered her house with a smile on her face. Sirius had managed to convince Lily he was charming, against all odds.

Lily turned the corner, and ran straight into her sister.

"What where your going freak!" She yelled while she tried to burn a hole through Lily's skull with her glare. After she had sufficient time to glower, she stepped back and surveyed Lily's attire and appearance.

"Wow Lily, the boys must love you. Letting ourselves go a bit are we?"

Lily just rolled her eyes and continued onto her room. It was odd the way Sirius made her feel. She had spent so much time becoming self-conscious about herself under his eye, but just now he made her forget all of that. She actually felt pretty with him.

When she entered her room she saw a piece of scarce mail sitting on her bed. One of few letters she had got this summer.

_Lily, I'm sorry I didn't respond to your letter sooner, there has been a lot going on here at home. That is actually the reason I am writing to you, I need to know if I can stay with you the remainder of break. My parents are getting a divorce. I know, can you believe it? Well its chaotic here, mums a mess, and my dad moved out yesterday. I just want to get away from it all. Please tell me I can stay with you! All my love, Jude- _

Lily re read the letter a few times then pulled out a new piece of parchment to respond. Judith's parents always had a storybook marriage! It must be really bad if she didn't even want to live with them anymore.

She finished tying the letter to Wilma's leg and sent her off. Lily watched her fly off for a while; Wilma seemed very pleased to be given something to do. Her thoughts turned to Sirius as she watched her owl sore off. He had apologized twice over and been a complete pleasure, which was odd considering she had never had a civil conversation with him before today. A smile crept onto her face as she thought of how Sirius threw her over his shoulder and refused to let her down until she promised she wasn't mad anymore. The best Sirius apology a girl could ask for.

Soon Lily drifted off to sleep, but it was cut short by a paper airplane that was flying into her head.

"Oh c'mon!" She said, giving in and sitting up in bed. Inside the paper contained only a few words,

_Sneak out, want to see you.  
-Sirius_

Lily jumped out of bed and looked out her window, the same window she snuck out to see James not so long ago. When she looked out this time however, it was Sirius who was waiting for her.

She didn't hesitate and pulled on a jumper before hopping out her window.

"Is something wrong?" she asked.

"Yes," he said, walking towards her, "I forgot to say goodnight," and he leaned into close to her ear, making all the hairs on her neck stand up, "Goodnight Lily." The way he said her name was like hearing poetry. He bent down towards her lips, and laid a soft peck on them, before jumping onto his broom and flying towards James.

Lily was left hugging her body in a daze from Sirius' intensity.

"Well that was pleasant," she said to no one.

She climbed back inside from the way she came out and rolled over; letting the smile she was holding back, take over her face. She certainly had some news for Judith!

A/N: Man I get distracted easily! Sorry!


	5. Gryffindors Only

This world belongs to J.K. Rowling so I'm just playing around with characters and ideas already created. enjoy!

This chapter has been revised: 12/7/09

* * *

**Gryffindors Only**

With a look of pure disgust, Lily watched her sister nibble at one of the various vegetables littering her plate.

"You know Petunia, one day I think you are going to turn into one of your precious vegetables."

In response Petunia speared a steamed carrot and threw it into her mouth whole.

"Lily, it would do you good to create some good eating habits like Petunia's. Remember what we talked about," their Mother cut in.

Lily looked back to Petunia, and the look on her face read that Christmas had just come early… for her. Lily sighed and accepted she was going to be the butt of fat jokes in this family.

"Thanks Mum," Lily grumbled back, moving her now very unappealing food around with her fork.

"So when is your freak friend getting here?" Petunia asked, still looking like she won a new car.

"I thin-" She began, but she never finished as the doorbell cut her off.

"Now!" she screamed instead.

Lily practically skipped to go welcome in her troubled friend, and threw open the front door.

"Never, I mean never, take the knight bus if you can help it," Judith said dropping the end of her trunk she was still holding. Lily just laughed and embraced her tired looking friend.

"Hi Mr. Evans, thank you for letting me stay here," Judith addressed to Mr. Evans, who had walked up behind them.

"Don't mention it, it's nice to have you. Now leave your trunk, I'll get it upstairs for you. Everyone is in the kitchen if you'd like to say hello."

"Thank you," she said, giving him a smile.

"Do you want to say hi?" Lily asked, tilting her head toward the kitchen.

"Might as well, I will be living here the next two weeks right?" she responded. Lily was taken by surprise at Judith's friendly introductions to her family. She had expected to be stuck in her pity party the rest of the summer, but she passed it off as an attempt to make a good impression, and didn't think of it again.

Judith was even nice to Petunia, whom Lily had made sure Judith was well versed about. Petunia of course rose to all expectations of herself and shot Judith and evil glare before spearing another steamed carrot, put it in her mouth, and sharply drug out the fork against her teeth.

"Do you care if I take a shower Lils?" Jude asked.

"You aren't going to ask for permission every time you need a shower are you? It's going to be a long two weeks if you are."

She just rolled her eyes, "Sorry for trying to be polite!"

"Its okay, just don't let it happen again!" Lily shouted back at her retreating back. It bothered her why she was so keen on being there for her during her parents divorce. After all, where was Judith when the Marauders were tormenting Lily? Her mother always said it does no good to dwell on the negative in life; you need to push past it. And right now Lily had a friend who needed her, and they had been best friends for long enough that she couldn't just let one incident break them up. Besides who would she have if she didn't have Judith?

When Judith rejoined Lily in her room, she plopped down on the trundle that was set up for her. Lily couldn't help but think, "James' bed," with a pang. Judith's drying hair spilled over the edge of the bed. It was brown, thin, and particularly dry at the ends. During the holidays she would literally swoop her hair over an ironing board and iron it to make it lay nice and smooth. During the school year she could just use magic however.

"So your parents… want to talk about it?"

She rolled onto her stomach to look at Lily and drew in a breath like she was about to speak, but instead released it into a sigh thinking better of it. She flopped down onto her back and spoke to the ceiling instead.

"Well my dad moved out."

"Aren't you going to be worried about her living alone now?"

"Well she still has Mal, and Ali, so she wont be alone. Ali would have started Hogwarts this year if she were a witch. She wanted to be one desperately, but she never got a letter. Poor girl, she is so disappointed."

Judith has two younger sisters and they all look freakishly alike. Where as Petunia and Lily don't even look like distant cousins despite being sisters.

"So what's new with you, Lily?" Judith said, breaking the silence. Butterflies immediately rose to life in Lily's stomach.

"Well actually, a lot! Don't I look any different?"

Lily was a bit put out that all her hard work hadn't paid off, and maybe her chances weren't noticeable. She had, since being home, got a new hairstyle, hair color, tan, her ears pierced, a manicure, a pedicure, shaped eyebrows, new wardrobe, and she even wore make up now. She rolled over to look more properly and Lily hit a pose with her arms behind her head, giving Jude a smoldering look. Jude laughed and tossed her pillow at Lily.

"Damn Lily, you look hot! I don't know why I didn't notice before. I suppose my mind has been somewhere else."

"I suppose. That and since you have been here you have met my family, showered, and spent a good chunk of time staring at my ceiling and not me," Lily snickered.

She laughed again "Ya, so what did you do?"

"Just a little help from the infamous Debbie Evans!"

"Infamous you say?"

"Yes, infamous, look at the wonders she did on little, mousy Lily." Judith let out a forced chuckle, blushed a bit, and looked away.

"Lily, you never looked like a bloody rodent, those guys are just pricks. Just wait till they see you when term starts. They'll all being putting a foot in their mouths." Lily was pleased with her comment and thought now was a good time to tell her about her interactions with James and Sirius. She told her about the spat her and James got in, and about Sirius warming up to her and occasionally kissing her. She listened without interrupting and looked at her a bit shocked.

"Wow, how is James taking Sirius fancying you?" she asked, with a raised eyebrow.

"What? I don't know why he would care; besides, I haven't even seen him since our fight in his driveway. Whenever I spend time with Sirius, it is just us."

"Hmm, well Potter obviously adores you Lily. He stares at you all the time, that's probably why he doesn't come around when you and Sirius are together." Is everyone going bonkers? Both Jude and her Mum think she is an object of admiration or something. She decided to write Becky and fill her in so she wouldn't have to have this conversation again. She didn't fancy Sirius enough to date him or anything, but to be honest; the positive attention she was receiving was nice for once.

* * *

Lily was awoken two mornings later by an annoying, enchanted paper airplane ramming into her head. It repeatedly flew into her ear until she finally gave up sleeping and snatched it from the air. She unfolded the airplane to realize it was not a little wake up note, but rather an invitation to a party at the Potters. Sirius and James were throwing a little, "Gryffindor only" party, and had extended an invitation to her and Jude.

"Oi, Sleeping beauty, check this out," She refolded the airplane and directed it to Jude so she would awake to the same fate as she did. When she woke she immediately went into girly, "what do I wear," panic mode. Lily had no idea how it could happen so fast.

"Let's just ask my mum," Lily responded, while yawning. She was still trying to figure out how Judith could get so worked up so early? It was then that Lily noticed her eyeing her wardrobe where there were several sleeves with tags attached hanging out of the open door. As she realized what Jude was silently pleading she snapped her head back at her.

"What are you looking at?" She had come to cherish her wardrobe her Mother created for her. It made her unique, and had built something between her Mum and her that had never been there before.

* * *

In the end, Jude ended up borrowing clothes, but Lily made sure they were previously worn, and allowed Jude to pick only after Lily was done.

"Wow, this is James' house?" Jude asked, jaw dropped.

"Ya, it is nice isn't it? Who would have thought this could be down the street from my place?" Lily asked, stopping in front of the driveway. It really was a marvelous home; 'nice' was an understatement.

"So you wont be mad if we separate a bit during mingling, right?" Jude confirmed, rather than asked, without taking her eyes off his house.

"Ya, you know the way back if we get split up." Frankly, Lily was a little relieved. She loved having Judith stay over, but a little breathing room would do them both good.

They let themselves in through the front door, and Lily immediately sought out James, like second nature. He saw them and did a double take; he ran his hand through his hair several times before he actually began walking towards them. To any outsider it would look as though James were prepping himself for the ladies, but Lily knew he must have been nervous about something.

When James made it over to them his demeanor changed swiftly. He put on a charade of confidence and slid his arms around them both.

"Ladies, you made it! Welcome to my home. Food's in the kitchen, dancing in the ballroom, and the living room is open for, what can I say, more quiet time." He waggled his eyebrows at them at the last announcement and lowered drinks in front of them. They both took a sip from their glasses and gave each other a knowing look. Spiked pumpkin juice. This would be an interesting party.

"Well, l will leave you to it girls, enjoy yourselves."

As he lowered his arm from Lily's shoulder he let his hand drag all the way down her arm and linger on her fingers. When she turned around, she met his strong unmoving gaze. He was focused on her, back to his previous demeanor and their eyes locked for a few seconds before he turned to greet some new coming guests.

"I told you he adores you," said Jude, who had obviously been watching the silent moment exchanged between them.

"No, I think I just received a plea for forgiveness," Lily said, shaking her head. She knew with every fiber of her being, that the guilt in his eyes was true. It's like they always said, they could communicate with just one look, and that was a pretty strong one. Even so, Lily knew, that if she hadn't been gradually gaining confidence over break, things might have been different; she probably wouldn't even be here.

They set off towards the kitchen where people where gathering that weren't quite interested in a good snog or dancing. Lily spotted Becky sitting with another girl from her own year, Julie, and she waved to get her attention. As soon as they made eye contact their companions Jude and Julie were forgotten.

"Bloody Hell, Lily, you look gorgeous, you look like you could be a 6th year at least!" Becky whispered in her ear as they hugged.

"Well thanks!" Lily responded with glee, as Becky took a step back to examine her closer, never letting go of her hands.

"Honestly, I mean you told me you got a makeover in your letter, but I did not expect this!"

"Have you seen Sirius yet?" she added.

"No I haven't actually, but I've only just arrived. I saw a clump of boys in the entryway and I can assume he was in there."

Sirius was honestly the last thing on Lily's mind, she had completely lost Judith already, she had to play catch up with Bec, and she couldn't help but notice the large number of heads doing double takes in her direction. If Sirius doesn't want to spend the evening with her, that is his problem, Lily was not the type of girl to chase around a moan all night.

Becky and Lily had planted themselves in the kitchen for majority of the evening, people came and went and they remained. They were having quite the heated discussion however. Becky, it turned out, was interested in Remus! Lily was surprisingly ecstatic about this little love development.

After scheming a plan to get Remus and Becky together (and several glasses of pumpkin juice later) they stumbled into the ballroom. They must have danced with every single person in there. Lily also became reunited with Sirius, who she ended up dancing with the most. She could honestly say he is quite the dancer, but if she weren't so drunk he would have been hexed into next week for his 'hand placement'.

After a while, she became blatantly aware that she was not only alone, but was also Becky-less, and Judith-less. Lily decided to go find them and found her way to the living room. It was a difficult task since obviously some 'mood lighting' had been cast and there was barely a light on, in that half of the house. She walked toward the general direction of the living room hugging the wall so she wouldn't lose my balance when I ran straight into someone.

"Umph, sorry guys," she stammered. She had run straight into a couple that had been pushed up against the wall in a heated kiss. They said nothing, and only took a second to look at her, catch their breath and then start going at it again.

"...All right then," she said, more to herself than to them, and went off to find the make out room again. She wasn't entirely sure why she was trying to find them there. After all, both of them are single, and not even attached to someone. At least she sort of had Sirius, she should be in here getting her snog on now that she thought about it!

It took Lily a second to realize she had reached her destination; she glanced around the room and spotted Becky first. She was sitting on Remus's lap slowly kissing him and occasionally stopping and exchanging words. Well it seems all their brilliant planning was a waste. But good for her!

She scanned the room again for Judith, but didn't catch sight of her anywhere. 'Meh' she thought, she must had already headed back to my house. So Lily started down the hall again the same way she did before, hugging the wall and putting one foot in front of the other. And of course, she ran into the same couple kissing again. Only this time she saw who it was.

"Sirius?" she whispered. A quick glance at the girl in his arms and she recognized her as Becky's friend Julie.

"Lily, Hey, uh, I..." he stuttered out, but he eventually faded out. What a two timing prick! She felt the jealousy monster roar up inside of her, but with all the alcohol she had consumed it just made her heat up. So Lily slapped Sirius hard against the cheek for the second time in her life. Only this time she did the slap justice.

* * *

A/N: Hope this chapter reads better! Let me know!


	6. The Truth of it All

Same disclaimer applies, everything belongs to J.K Rowling, besides the plot.

This chapter was revised and updated 12/7/09

* * *

Chapter 6: The Truth of it All

Lily took a step back and examined the filth before her. Sirius slowly turned his head back to face her after his blow to the face, and kept his chin high. Being a Black had taught him that, he's too proud to let a slap offend him. All the while Julie just stood there like a big lump on a log; she didn't look at either of them, but rather blinked frequently and looked annoyed at a light fixture.

"Lils," Sirius began, taking a step forward.

"Do NOT call me that," she spat back at him, surprisingly sternly and clearly.

"Lily, me and you, we were never going to have a thing, your James's girl."

"Oh that's rich, what the hell are you talking about?" Another person on about her and James, everyone was seriously losing it.

"I am talking about my best mate in this world silently claiming you as his own. We all know how badly he wants you even if he never talks about it; he stares at you all the time. I know he kissed you last spring Lily; he hasn't been the same since."

"Don't try and pin your problems on James, you led me on, you're the one who two timed me, not him!"

"Oh come off it Lily! You never liked me! You liked the _idea_ of you and me, the idea of having a boyfriend, but you never actually wanted to date me, and you know it!"

"Your right, who would want to date a scum bag like you?"

"He's all yours toots," she directed towards Julie and without a second glance, turned on her heal and walked away from them. As she was walking away Julie could be heard whining, sounding a lot like, 'Siiiiriuuuus'.

Without any sign of Jude, Lily made her way to leave, with surprising balance. It must have been really late, she observed as she walked out. The only people who were left seemed to have been clumped in the living room that she was walking away from.

"Hey Lily!" someone called from her left.

She turned in the darkness and saw a tall gangly boy approaching her. As he got closer she made James's features out, his glasses, his messy hair, and even his crooked smile.

"Want a ride home?" he asked, very straight forward.

Lily just starred up at him, her anger dissipating more with every second.

"Ride?"

"Ya, do you want me to fly you home, I can fly you straight into your room so you wont get in trouble."

"Thanks, but you know I don't like flying, I would rather walk," and she began proceeding to the door. James jogged a bit so he was ahead of her and blocked the way out.

"Lily, you are way past your curfew and no offense, but good luck trying to sneak in without being caught, especially in you're... condition." Even as he said this she swayed ever so slightly, or was it a lot? She considered what he said and decided that he was right. As usual.

"Okay, but can you please stay low, I don't think I can handle looping around, even if it isn't that far."

As she said this, her words came out slurred, shaky, and she stuttered all at the same time as a result of drinking, fear of flying, and talking to James. She really shouldn't' have been flying right now. They walked around the side of his house and she climbed on behind him like she had the night they kissed, and he kicked off the ground gently. Once again, she had to concentrate on not throwing up with every ounce of strength she had. She was so distracted she didn't even realize that they were hovering right outside her bedroom window. James turned his head and whispered in her ear sending a warm sensation through her whole body that caused Lily to open her eyes for the first time.

"Lily who is that, who's in your room?"

Without even looking she just said "Judith is staying with me, don't worry about it," but warning flags were still going off in James's head and he did not make a move.

"No, someone else is in there, there is a guy in there too." This caught Lily's attention. She turned her head toward the window and saw the back of someone sitting on Judith's trundle talking in hushed voices to her. Lily clung a little tighter to James as she felt a wave of nausea hit. She just wanted land… and her bed.

"James, who is that?" she asked, her head now pressed between his shoulder blades.

"No clue," and he flew them slowly into the room. James, who thinks of everything, made their presence aware gradually so that Judith wouldn't scream.

The moment they touched down, Lily flung myself onto her bed. She had momentarily forgotten about the intruder in my room until James broke the silence.

"Andy?" James asked a little dumbfounded. Andy then took his eyes off Judith for the first time, stood up and plastered a huge fake smile on his face.

"James, great party! Thank you so much-" he stood up sticking his hand out to shake James'.

James seemed to recognize this boy while Lily still wasn't making any connections. He definitely wasn't in their year, but it seemed he had to be a Gryffindor. Deciding that since she didn't know him, it would be best if she just lay there and ignore the situation entirely.

"Thanks, no problem," James responded, taking Andy's hand. I noticed as they stood together that James was a few inches taller than him.

"So, I hear you made head boy this year?" he added, stepping back. "A seventh year?" Lily thought.

"Yes, just got my letter yesterday, but I suppose I should be off." He nodded to both James and Lily, then bent down and gave Judith a swift kiss on the cheek and disaparated on the spot.

There was only silence left in the room as Lily laid on her back completely confused, James stood awkwardly also trying to process everything, and Judith sat up on her trundle with her eyes darting between them waiting for one of them to scrutinize her. Finally, James seemed to come to his senses and realized he was still standing in Lily's room.

"Well goodnight ladies, thank you for coming tonight," and he jumped on his broom and took off towards his house with amazing speed, before they could even respond. James' departure seemed to have knocked Lily out of her stupor and she sat up and rounded on Judith.

"Bloody hell Jude?! Do you want to go back to Hogwarts this year? What were you thinking!?" She was furious all of a sudden.

Had Lily not explicitly told Judith upon her arrival of the strict no boys in their room's rule that Petunia had caused?

"Lily I'm sorry! I would have told you, but I couldn't find you anywhere!"

"What if my parents would have found out? How could you just take advantage of me like this? There was perfectly good bedrooms back at James' house you know."

"Don't worry, Andy put a silencing spell around the room, there is no way anyone could have known we were in here."

"What are you doing with him anyways? Don't you think he's a bit old for you? Your fourteen!"

"I know, I know, but once we started talking it was like there was no age difference between us. We have so much in common, he's perfect." As she said this her eyes glossed over a bit and Lily could tell she was reminiscing about whatever it is they did all night. Personally, she didn't care, if he's so great then why is he going after 4th years? He wasn't even cute.

Jude was still reminiscing so Lily decided not to push it any further, she stripped down to her underwear and passed out in that. She was way too tired to even get out of bed.

The next morning Lily felt the familiar tapping on her head and snatched what she now knew to be an annoying airplane out of the air. She really needed to close the window at night. After scanning the note quickly, the only thing that sunk in was that it was from Remus.

She rubbed as much sleep out of her eyes as she could to make reading easier and read it again more clearly.

_Lily, Becky spent the night at the Potters' with me last night, I am sending her over to your house so James' parents don't flip. Expect her in about five. - Remus_

Lily jumped out of my bed and pulled some sweats on. Even though Becky was her friend, it would be suspicious if a third girl were sleeping in the room without warning. She ran downstairs to tell her mum and she swallowed everything.

"Mum, my friend Becky is in town and she just sent me an owl telling me she was going to drop by and say hello, I don't think she will be over long, but I thought you should know," Lily said quickly, leaving no room for interruptions.

But it didn't matter; she just kept on humming and flipping through the catalogue she was shopping in.

"That's wonderful dear. I will put on some tea when you're ready," she replied, without a glance.

When Becky arrived Lily didn't even give her time to introduce herself to her mum, she just pulled her upstairs to her bedroom. As soon as the door was shut behind her, Lily rounded.

"Okay, SPILL!" She blushed, looked at her feet and just sank into the chair in the corner of the room.

"I already saw you two snogging, so you might as well get it over with girl!" Lily launched herself onto her bed so she was on her stomach facing Bec with her head propped in her hands like a child who was about to hear their favorite bedtime story.

"Did you?" she asked, looking up from the floor.

"You little snooper, Well you know how we were dancing around in the ballroom, well somehow without really realizing it I ended up dancing with Remus, I believe I was all over him."

Lily grinned ear to ear.

"Well neither of us were really stable enough to dance any longer so we ended up in the living room where a lot of snogging took place, a little getting to know each other, and nothing else. Promise," she added, after she caught Lily's suspecting glance.

"Then we passed out… and James had a minor freak out when he found us this morning and next thing I know they are sending me down the road to you!"

"Wow, well so much for our plan to get you guys together, huh? Couldn't wait a week?"

"Oh shite that reminds me Lily! He talked about last year when they were so horrible to you!" Lily felt her stomach drop, originally she had really wanted to know what provoked them to treat her like a rodent, but she had become comfortable with pretending it never happened and embracing the better, no where near rodent looking Lily. Was she ready for this?

While she was thinking it over Becky had crawled into her bed with Lily so they wouldn't wake up the stirring Judith. Becky was still a little bitter about Jude not looking out for Lily.

"Well like I said, Remus and myself were making out in the living room when James walks in, scans the room and then walked out. Remus saw this and then said something like 'Poor James, he's been doing that all night, if you ask me he is checking to see if Lily is in here hooking up with anyone, especially Sirius."

Lily gasped at this, so James did know about her and Sirius.

Becky continued, "Ya I guess when you guys came back from Easter break last spring Peter noticed something off straight away. James was acting differently, more reserved and I guess he kept stealing glances at you every chance he got." Lily thought back to the train ride last spring when they had indeed been catching each other starring at one another.

"Well this did not go unnoticed by Peter," Becky continued. "He said something to James and James just said something while staring at you like 'Ya she's great huh? She's a great kisser too' without even realizing it. So Peter took immediate action, and tried to get you out of James' head. He thought you would break up the Marauders, so they distanced you from them. I guess Peter and Sirius were mostly behind it. James didn't know what was going on, but didn't want to go against his best friends."

Lily rolled onto her back. She _knew_ James couldn't have anything to do with it. So they were trying to keep her and James apart? Its not like they were moving in together or getting married or something. Now she would never know what would have became of her and James.

"You okay, Lily? I just thought you would want to know."

"Ya, I am fine, how long are you staying by the way?" She didn't want to talk about it anymore, what's done is done. Change of subject is good.

"Oh I am just waiting for the signal that it's okay to go back to the Potters and use their fireplace to floo home," she said, a bit absent mindedly. They sat in silence for God knows how long, both immersed in thought. Did James really like Lily? How could his friends do that to him if he did. What kind of a friend would be that selfish? Most importantly, what should Lily say to him next time she saw him or what does she say to Sirius? She needed time to think. She couldn't be this close to them the rest of the week.

Becky broke the silence and pulled Lily out of her reverie, "What are you thinking about Lily?"

She sighed, "How awkward it is going to be to face any of the Marauders again."

"Nah, it wont be bad, they don't know that you know."

"But I do know. I can never look at any of them the same again. How am I going to live down the street from their damn headquarters? Do I just pretend I don't know James fancies me, Sirius played me, and the other two tried to tear us apart?"

"Well you and Jude can always come stay with me," Becky stated as if it was obvious.

"I live walking distance from Diagon Alley, we could get all of our school shopping done together!" The further along she got into the idea the more high-pitched her voice got with excitement.

"Really? We could both stay? You wouldn't mind?" She just shook her head side-to-side trying to hide her smile. Lily answered before even consulting Jude, but she had never stayed in the city!

* * *

After only 3 days at Becky's, Judith and Lily could understand why Becky had been so excited for the company. They had only seen her parents there twice since they got there. They were just left to fend for themselves.

"What's that noise?" Judith asked one evening as they all laid around Becky's room. As she asked, Lily noticed for the first time, there was a loud sort of bass noise emitting from somewhere nearby.

"Oh, there is a popular muggle bar sort of thing a building down. Tonight must be a special night, its always louder when there's something going on," Becky replied, absent-mindedly.

"Are you serious?" Lily squealed unexpectantly! They were walking distance from somewhere they could get dressed up and dance, and we were sitting on their bums in Becky's room for the 4th straight night?

Becky just looked at Lily skeptically, "No, I made the whole thing up- Of course I'm serious!"

"Well let's go then! I love dancing!" Judith and Becky just looked at each other then back to Lily.

"Lets gooooo," she whined.

"Okay, I'm in," Jude responded first, smiling. Then they both turned to look at Becky. Lily gave her the best puppy dogface to plea with her.

"Okay! Lets change, we are going to need less clothes on than this," she said dryly, as if we were forcing her to go. They quickly changed into some tight bellbottom pants and halter with almost no backs. Having a shop-a-holic muggle mother had proven to be a little beneficial. They would blend in perfectly, and if they did stand out, it would be for other reasons.

"Okay, game faces everyone, we aren't old enough to get in so don't give anyone any reason to suggest that we are too young," Becky stated in the elevator. Lily was ecstatic; she always wanted to go dancing like Petunia. They got in the bar with a flick of Lily's red hair.

At first glance the bar seemed sort of empty, but then they realized that everyone was gathered around a lit up floor where some guy was discoing like they had never seen. They couldn't stop watching him. When the song ended everyone broke out of their hypnosis and went back to dancing, drinking, or whatever else they may have been doing.

Becky, Judith and Lily all looked at each other then burst out laughing for no reason. They found a place on the dance floor and it wasn't long before random muggle guys had joined them. Lily was dancing with a particularly handsome guy. He was probably 6 feet tall, very well built and had long brown hair that swept around his face. They didn't ask each other's names, they just enjoyed each other's company. Lily made sure she stayed close enough to Jude and Bec to keep an eye on them, she did NOT want to get stranded here once this guy found someone hotter to dance with. But it turned out she didn't have to worry about it, because he didn't, and they danced together the remainder of her time there.

The girls found each other after probably an hour, after they noticed the other sober people clearing out and the drunken ones staggering around the dance floor. They agreed that this was the best idea they ever had. Lily doubted she would ever see her hot dancer friend again, but this was the perfect thing to take my mind off everything, and give her that confidence boost.

In two days they would be heading to Kings Cross, they were returning to Hogwarts, and the best part of it all was, she didn't have to go with the Potter family.


	7. Guilty Heart

Same disclaimer applies, everything belongs to J.K. Rowling accept the plot.

Revised on 12/7/09

* * *

Chapter 7: Guilty Heart

Lily followed Becky and Jude in a comfortable silence to an empty, horseless carriage. The train ride had been a very successful, very marauders-less and most importantly, Potter Family-less experience. Lily sighed and shifted her bag to the other arm, if Potter was good for one thing, it was that he did help a lady in distress, she never had to carry her things off the train, well until now.

She began ascending the steps to the carriage with some difficulty after Becky had settled into a seat, when she felt a warm hand offer her free hand support. She turned around to see a boy she had never seen before blushing then running off to join his friends in the carriage ahead of them. She turned in her seat and mirrored Judith and Becky's baffled expressions.

"What the hell was that?" she asked, stunned.

"Random act of kindness?" Judith suggested, innocently.

"Nah, I would say start getting used to a little extra attention Lils," Becky added, very smoothly raising an eyebrow.

Damn, Lily thought to herself. She knew she looked different, but she didn't think she did so enough to provoke random (male) students to go out of their way to help her like that. She was just trying to improve her self to make herself average, and not appealing to rodents.

Not, thirty minutes later Becky, Judith, and Lily made quite an entrance into the Great hall clutching onto each other for dear life and laughing so hard it came out a lot like gasps for air. They were extra giddy from the sugar quills they had practically inhaled earlier and couldn't stop laughing about their second encounter with 'Mr. Random Act of Kindness'.

_(flashback)_

_The carriage started to slow and the three girls allowed identical stupid grins to spread across their faces. They were all giddy about one thing or another and the sugar quills were certainly heightening their excitement level overall._

_Lily was the last to step out of the carriage and she could hear Becky trying to stifle her giggles unsuccessfully so she sounded a bit like she was grunting or snorting. As Lily opened her mouth to make fun of her, she spotted the source of her laughter. 'Mr. Random Act of Kindness' and his friends were waiting to accompany the three of them to the castle. Lily turned and looked to her friends and they all had identical expressions, a bit like they had been sucking on a lemon, because of their held in laughs. They linked arms and hung on each other for support as they approached the boys. They immediately took the girl's things they were carrying; they thanked them quickly as the boys let them ascend the stairs to the castle first. They walked swiftly, putting a bit of distance between them._

"_Gee Lily, being your best friend sure does have its advantages," Jude whispered, so only Lily and Becky would hear. Lily gave her a swift slap on the arm and doubled her efforts to hold in her laughter. One of the boys finally got the courage to catch up with them, she recognized him as 'Mr. Random act of Kindness's' friend. He walked to the right of Becky and tried to chat her up. "Hi, I'm Jonathan," he sung,_ _breathlessly to Bec. Lily and Jude again had to contain their fits of laughter. "Hi," was all Becky offered back to the boy carrying her bag. "You're a 5th year right?"_

"_Mmmhmm," she replied nodding with her lips sealed tight. "I'm Jonathan," he offered again. This time Becky managed to form a complete thought; she turned her head to face him, but kept her arm linked strongly through Lily's. "You keep saying that, thank you for carrying my bag," and she reached out and grabbed it as she pulled Lily and Jude through the front door, where they immediately started laughing._

"_What was that!?" Judith managed. _

"_He is a 3rd year!" Becky said, waving her hand in the air. "What an insult!" _

They made their way to the Gryffindor table where Becky left the younger two girls to join her fellow 5th years near the middle of the table. She had planned on sitting with them before, but after being hit on by a 3rd year, she needed to make her position in the school clear. Judith and Lily walked towards a group of jumbled 4th and 3rd year girls. They were huddled together talking excitedly about something.

Lily flashed a knowing smile to Becky when they saw a corner of Madam Malkin's catalogue. She knew it to be the edition that featured Janet twirling around in a royal blue robe on the bottom of page 42. Her big modeling debut. She had seen it at Becky's house and they predicted that Janet would carry around the stupid thing and tell anyone who would listen about her break out appearance.

Jude didn't catch Lily's look and slid in next to Janet. Lily sat next to Judith and they both greeted Janet like normal. She left the catalogue open and moved it around a bit, clearly waiting for one of them to comment on it. Lily decided she would not give her the satisfaction. Becky seemed to be thinking along the same lines, but it turned out she was just a bit slow, she really did just notice it and made a comment immediately when she did. For how smart she is, she was really daft sometimes.

"Oh Janet, you look so gorgeous in this picture. Do you have any more modeling jobs coming up? Are you going to be leaving school?" Judith asked with wide eyes.

As Janet began filling Becky in on her 'modeling career' loud enough for the whole table to hear, the mauderers sat down across from them making some third years move further down. Lily was looking at Janet with a bored expression and was making no effort to humor her in what was obviously a one shot deal that she got just because Madam Malkin is her father's mistress. Besides she was still bitter about last year, as far as she was concerned Janet was no more than an acquaintance, a room mate, someone she took classes with.

"Bit of a joke isn't it?" Lily heard someone say across the table. She turned her head and met Remus' eyes and smiled.

"You think so too?" she snorted. "The worst part of it is, is that we will probably hear about it the rest of the year."

"Well ya, especially since you came back this year turning heads everywhere you go."

Lily opened her mouth to make a comment, but he kept talking.

"You sort of stole her thunder you know, I don't think she was expecting to come back and have competition in her own room."

"What are you talking about, we aren't in some sort of beauty pageant. "

"What's a beauty pageant?" Remus asked, leaning back a little.

"Never mind," Lily snorted. She was constantly making muggle references that only her and Judith understood.

"Oh, well I think she expected everyone to be gushing over her and instant popularity, but instead the only ones who seem to be interested are Judith, and Sirius. If people are paying attention to any fourth years, it's you, not her."

Lily felt her cheeks blush, what started as a simple makeover had turned life altering. She turned her head down the table and saw a few heads quick turn and look away. She just wanted to change the subject, she felt uncomfortable having a conversation with herself the subject like this, but Remus kept on.

"You know, we never thought you were ugly Lily.

"It's just when we came back from break last, year Peter freaked out and thought that you were going to break up the Mauderers. So him and Sirius started the whole 'rodent' thing so you wouldn't want anything to do with us. James hated it; he had no idea what was going on. Anyways, he got all weird and distant, so hurting you was pointless," he finished drawing in a big breath. He had spit everything out really fast and in one long breath.

Lily just blinked at him. He must have had that on his chest for a while, it was obviously prepared the way it just rolled off his tongue. She forgave poor Remus, stupid peer pressure. Stupid Peter.

"Don't worry about it," She said quickly, tucking some hair behind her ear.

"Well, when you and James get together this time I promise we will stay out of it."

Lily snorted into her cup she was drinking from and laughed.

"Well that is sweet of you Remus, but that is not going to happen. If he really had liked me, or even as my best friend, why didn't he stick up for me, or comfort me this summer?" She paused and thought about it herself. Then added, "No, me and James will never be together I'm afraid. I doubt we will ever even be best friends again." She paused again and let what I said sink in. She felt what she said was true. She didn't believe James cared about her, he certainly wasn't there for her, he could have picked up the pieces, but Sirius did, well maybe he only got half the pieces.

Remus looked a little nervous while he let this sink in himself, Lily was sure that any guilt he felt just doubled. Now he probably felt that he had forever ruined the chance of a James and Lily relationship besides making her question her outward appearance for the rest of her life.

* * *

September went by quickly and before anyone knew it, October had hit. Hogwarts campus was like a beautiful canvas covered in orange, red and yellow that reflected the sun perfectly.

Lily was currently looking out the Gryffindor common room window longing to hear the leaves crunching beneath her feet. Fall was her favorite time of year, and she wanted to enjoy the crisp autumn air.

"Aw, c'mon Remy, it was worth it!"

She turned my head at the sound of James voice; him and the other mauderers were walking towards the portrait hole from the boy's dormitories.

Impulse came over her and she yelled out to them, "Hey guys, hold up!" They all paused and turned around with a bit of a goofy smirk on their faces. They weren't the only guys in the common room who looked up hoping they were the 'guys' being addressed.

"Yes, gorgeous?" Sirius asked cheekily rocking on his heals. Lily gave him a dirty look and noticed Remus check his watch for the second time.

"Are you guys going outside?" She asked hopefully. She wanted company when she went out.

This time James answered, "Nope, detention. Although, it may very well be outside, its not like it hasn't happened before. So I guess lets change that 'Nope' to a maybe."

"Ya," Peter added, "We have done detention in the Forbidden Forest at least once every year now. "

Lily's eyes widened, she had never had a detention before, and she always assumed they were held in the safety of a classroom doing some sort of lines. One night of detention in the Forbidden forest would be enough to keep her out of detention forever. Maybe that's what the professors were going for. Well actually, that's just enough motivation to stay out of trouble; Lily Evans is not going in the Forbidden Forest in this lifetime.

"Wow," she replied, "What did you guys do?"

James smirk widened a bit and he flashed some of his teeth while he leaned back against the wall.

"We charmed all of the suits of armor," now he was examining his fingernails as if this was impressive.

"To do what?" she asked, skeptically.

"To trip any Slytherin that walked past them."

"And slap any girl's butt that walked past," Sirius added, grinning.

"And now we have a weeks detention, and it is going to be another week of detention on top of that if we don't get going, have a good night Lily," Remus finished then walked out the portrait hole.

The other boys mumbled goodbyes and followed suit as Remus led the way to their detention.

Lily sighed at her failed attempt at some company outside and made her way up to the dorms to see what the girls were doing. Becky had left for the library while she was in the common room so she went straight to the 4th year dorms. When she walked in she saw Judith fixing herself in the mirror and Janet flipping through a magazine circling different girl's faces.

"Hey what's up?" she greeted closing the door behind her. They both gave her a glance and a hello and continued what they were doing.

"What are you girls up to tonight?" she asked, hopefully, or was it desperately?

Judith was the first to respond, "Me and Andy are hanging out again, he gets done patrolling in an hour so we are going to meet in front of the fat lady," she ended sighing lovingly.

"Julie, you know Julie right? 5th year? Well anyways she's going to help me find the perfect blonde. I mean I know I look good blonde, but there is so many different ones that I haven't tried yet," Janet said, still circling what Lily now noticed was different blondes in the magazine.

She wanted to roll her eyes, it was impossible to hold a conversation with either of these girls lately, all Judith talked about was Andy, and all Janet talked about was, well herself. She couldn't believe she had fooled herself that she would actually enjoy a _walk_ with one of these girls.

"Jude is still your friend," Lily remind myself, be nice, "Oh, right, well Jude, have fun on your date, you'll have to tell us about it when you get back."

"And Janet," she added waiting for her to look up," Good luck!"

She smiled up from her magazine after Lily said, this obviously pleased. She would have to settle for a lonely walk and she pulled on her jacket.

"See you girls later," she said, closing the door. She could be imagining it, but Lily was almost positive she heard Jude add, "If I make it back tonight." She has been going on about how she is going to spend the night in the heads dorm (which Lily didn't know existed until this year), but she is yet to abandon her own bed.

Lily followed two other girls, Katie and Torey out of the portrait hole. They were both 3rd years and had made themselves known in Gryffindor by making the quidditch team the past month, beating out two seventh year boys. She jogged and caught up to them as they were descending the stairs.

"Hey Lily!" Katie said happily, she was extremely good at quidditch, but she wasn't the brightest witch. She was known for not being able to control her magic very well.

"Hey!" Lily greeted back. "Where are you girls off to?" She asked with crossed fingers.

"Oh we were just headed out to the lake. Want to join us?" Torey answered, equally as cheery.

Lily let out the breath she was holding, "Oh thank God," she exasperated. "I thought I was going to be wandering the grounds alone!" she really enjoyed these girls company; she was in the wrong year. Why couldn't she have been born a year earlier, or a year later?

They talked and laughed as they kicked their feet through the deep piles of leaves. The sun was beginning to set and they decided to go sit by the lake to watch it.

"Aw this is so romantic," Torey joked, as she linked her arm through Katie's and rested her head on her shoulder. It only lasted about a second before Katie threw her into a pile of leaves, though. Torey shrieked and landed with her legs in the air with a nice view up her skirt. Lily laughed and helped her up and noticed her face go blank looking at something over Lily's shoulder.

"Oh jeez, I love making an arse of myself in front of total hotties," she said, sarcastically. Katie and Lily turned to see what she was looking at over their shoulders and sure enough there were four Ravenclaw guys sitting under a tree nearby starring at them.

"Oh great," Katie added, just as sarcastic as Torey.

The boys continued looking at them and they continued looking blankly at them. Finally Torey with no expression on her face lifted her arm in a gesture of a wave then dropped it unceremoniously to her side again. The guys chuckled and one stood up brushing off his trousers.

"Oh my God," Lily shrieked, grabbing onto Katie's arm.

"What?" she asked, taken back?

"I know him!" Lily hissed as he started to dreamily walk towards them. "Oh my God, I thought he was a muggle!"

Katie looked at Lily confused, "Derek? But surely you must have seen him play quidditch? He's easily the best player in the school Lily!"

"WHAT!" She said, in a high-pitched voice as quiet as she could, as the boy got closer. Lily squeezed Katie's arm tighter and Torey moved closer also. He was right in front of them, in all his glory, at least 4 inches taller than any of them.

He looked straight at Lily and smiled, "Hey, remember me?" and he leaned in and kissed her cheek as a greeting.

Lily starred at him open mouthed for a second. The boy she had danced with, that she never thought she would see again, was standing in front of her at Hogwarts.

"I-I thought you were a muggle?" She asked stupidly. He just smiled and chuckled as he shifted his weight to his other leg.

"Did you? I knew who you were."

"Why didn't you say anything?"

"I assumed you knew!" he laughed flipping his hair back. "Well I guess we haven't been formally introduced then, I'm Derek, I am a 5th year Ravenclaw and captain of the quidditch team," he finished, holding out his hand.

"Lily, 4th year Gryffindor," she finished taking his hand.

"And an excellent dancer," he added, smiling flirty earning Lily a weird look from Torey. Then out of the corner of her eye she saw her lean back and look at Katie and mouth 'dancer?' with a confused face.

"And your Katie and Torey, I saw your impressive tryouts, I'm excited to see what you two are made of when we play you." Both Katie and Torey snapped their heads forward at the sound of their names.

Katie and Torey exchanged shocked looks, but both beamed when they looked back at him and shot out some 'thank yous.'

"Well I was wondering Lily, if you didn't have any plans for next weekend, if you would like to accompany me to the first Hogsmeade visit?"

Lily stared at him with her mouth open a second longer than I would have liked and he reached forward and lifted her chin with his warm hand so that her jaw came back in contact with the rest of her head. She blushed deeply and nodded vigorously.

"Of, course! I would love to go with you!" she managed to spew out.

"Great!" he explained, clapping his hands together. Then he turned his attention to Torey and Katie again, "If you girls don't have any plans either," he started, and they began shaking their heads 'no' before he finished. "Well, my two friends, the blonde one and the little shorter one," he pointed back with his thumb and a head nod.

All three of them peered over Derek's broad shoulder and the two boys he described smiled and waved. "Well they would really like if you girls would accompany them, we could all go together!" he finished smiling.

"Really?" Torey asked in a very unlike her, girly voice.

Derek raised an eyebrow, "Well of course, I wouldn't make this up," he laughed, "They are just a bit shy."

"Well that won't do," and Torey and Katie walked past Derek and straight to the guys that waved. Derek and Lily looked back at them and saw them introducing themselves and laughing.

He looked back to Lily a bit quizzically, but she just raised a shoulder and replied, "They're a bit outgoing."

"That's perfect," he replied. Then he grabbed her hand as Katie and Torey were jogging back to us, and leaned forward and lightly kissed her cheek. "See you Saturday lovely," and he pulled back still holding her hand.

"See you," was all she could get out before she blushed again, deeply. Then he turned and walked back to his friends where the three girls watched them talk animatedly and occasionally glance back at them. Torey was the first to snap out of it and linked her arms through both Lily and Katie's.

"Please tell me we have dates with some of the hottest guys in Hogwarts. Someone pinch me," she said.

Katie wasted no time and pinched her, "You're going on a date with one of the hottest guys in Hogwarts."

When they returned to the common room, much later that night, the marauders were back from detention already. James looked up immediately upon their entrance, and him and Lily locked eyes. She was instantly filled with a sense of guilt. Was it wrong to give Derek a chance before James?

* * *

questions, comments, concerns?


	8. The Date is Everything

**Disclaimer: **Same disclaimer applies, J.K. Rowling owns everything, I created the plot.

Updated/revised 12/7/09

* * *

**Chapter 8: The Date is Everything**

Lily shook her head for letting herself feel guilty, even if it was only for a moment. If James still had feelings for her that was his problem. He owed her big time, and he would have to prove himself if she was ever to let him get close to her again. Besides who knows what her date with Derek could lead to, they could really hit if off.

She waved off Katie and Torey as they ran to tell their fellow third year roommates about their dates. She watched them and snorted when she saw them reenacting Torey falling in the leaves.

Lily spotted Becky and Remus talking innocently over on the couch, so looking for someone to tell as well, she went and collapsed next to Remus sighing really loud to get their attention. They both looked over to her lounging form that was grinning ear to ear.

"Well someone is in a good mood," Remus said.

"What happened Lil?"

"I've got a date for Hogsmeade!" At this outburst several eavesdropping heads turned up to Lily who was completely oblivious of the attention this news caused.

Becky squealed with excitement and Remus merely raised his eyebrows into his hair and quickly spared a glance at the other Mauderers sitting at a table a little ways away.

"So who is it?" Becky asked, quickly climbing over Remus to be closer to me.

Lily smirked at her, "You will never guess, I mean if I gave you 50 guesses you still probably wouldn't get it!"

"…Derek Kachel!" she answered, quickly without waiting for a response.

Becky went wide-eyed then she let out a low whistle. Remus gave her a dirty look and playfully slapped her on the arm, but she ignored him, as did Lily.

"I know," she nodded, leaning back again.

"Wow, I know Derek; we have Herbology and Care for Magical Creatures with Ravenclaw."

"Really? You will have to tell me more about him then! All I really know is he is drop dead gorgeous and he is a very sexy dancer, and--" but she was cut off as Becky grabbed her with wide eyes and glanced back at Remus.

"Dancer?" Remus asked.

"Let's go up to my dorm and talk about it okay?" Becky spat out quickly, ignoring Remus' question. Lily looked at her confused but agreed immediately anyways.

"We are going up to my room, girl talk you know," she explained to Remus, then leaned down and gave a confused looking Remus a kiss on the lips.

Becky began dragging Lily off to the girl's dormitories and Lily glanced back at Remus and shrugged my shoulders with a smile. Then she mouthed the words "Jealous?" and gave him a fake smoldering look indicating my alone time with Bec. He laughed and shook his head as he stood up and walked over to the other Mauderers who were beckoning him to sit with them.

Lily ran into Becky's room and jumped onto her bed, bouncing up and down in excitement. Bec ran over and joined Lily just as eager to hear more.

"I can't believe how lucky I am!" Lily gushed.

Becky just nodded happily in agreement.

"His friends asked Torey and Katie too ya know," Lily added.

"Oh ya? Those guys are inseparable; they are a lot like the Mauderers actually. Kyle is always tagging along a lot like Peter does." she finished laughing at their similarities.

Lily leaned her head back in amazement. This was going to be a great opportunity for her to get the guy.

"Why were you so anxious to get me up here by the way?"

"Oh um, well I sort of panicked. You see I never mentioned going dancing to Remus, but since I mean we weren't really dating at the time I didn't see the point, but I mean we aren't officially dating now I guess I just-" she stopped as Lily held her hand up to Bec's mouth.

"You're rambling, you didn't tell Remus, got it."

"Thanks," she added, blushing.

"Speaking of that night though, he was the one I was dancing with the whole night, didn't you recognize him?"

"Oh, I guess I had my own hands filled Lily," she said, turning even redder.

"Your secret is safe with me," Lily responded, reading her mind, "And Judith would never say anything."

Her shoulders visibly lowered in relief.

"Tony and Torey are perfect for each other; I don't know why we never thought of getting them together before." She began leaning back against a head post. "Also, they both play quidditch and Tony is quite shy and Torey is quite outgoing. It's perfect!"

"What about Katie's date?"

"Oh he's a real sweetheart. I've heard them giving him a hard time for being the sensitive type before."

Becky and Lily continued talking, when the door to the dorm opened.

Janet and Julie emerged looking a little shocked; Janet was now a bleach blonde and they had to do all they could to bite back a laugh.

"You've got to be joking!" Janet sighed.

"The posse is taking you Katie and Torey to Hogsmeade?" Julie asked, shocked.

"Posse?"

"Ya, that is what they call themselves everyone, knows that. They are like," she paused searching for the right words, "Ravenclaw's mauderers."

Becky, who had been shooting daggers and them both for interrupting so rudely, finally blurted out what they both were thinking,

"So who asked YOU to go?"

Janet shifted to her other leg, "Plenty of guys have shown interest, and I am just waiting for someone specific to ask."

Lily rolled her eyes, of course she would raise her standards after such a successful model.

"Well about you Jules, going with any of my other leftovers?" Lily asked in a chipper tone. She didn't know what came over her to say it, but any bitterness she felt about Sirius was released in that comment.

She didn't coherently respond, but rather mumbled something inaudible about Sirius getting his act together.

Julie promptly grabbed Janet's elbow and steered them both out of the dormitory in a fit of embarrassment and rage.

"Anyways, where were we?" Becky began before the door was even shut.

"Hogsmeade. Dates."

"Ah, yes, you have a gorgeous, smart, popular, athletic date, and just made miss model jealous. I remember now."

"Are you and Remus planning on going by the way?"

Becky began to blush and quick glanced to her right. Lily followed her gaze to a vase of orchids and looked back to her with a raised eyebrow.

"Orchids?"

"Oh, Lily it was so sweet! He left a note in my satchel asking me to Hogsmeade, and it was charmed to bloom into a bouquet of my favorite flowers as soon as I was done reading it."

"I didn't know you like orchids," Lily replied.

"I know, neither did I. Some charm huh?"

* * *

Remus walked over to the Mauderers running a hand through his hair. The other three friends remained huddled with their heads close together, but they each had their eyes on Remus.

"Well, how did it go my man?"

"What did she say?"

"I didn't even get the chance to talk to her. She sat down and said she had a date and barely got out three sentences before Becky pulled her upstairs." Remus replied, defeated.

"Bloody hell," Peter spoke up, sparing a glance at James.

James had a readable look on his face of protectiveness and disappointment all in one. The other three mauderers all shifted their eyes to James and waited patiently for him to make a verbal response to this information.

"So who is this chum," He said casually.

Remus seemed to exhale a breath he was holding against his will. "Some Derek Rachel guy from Ravenclaw, didn't recognize the name personally."

"Derek Kachel?" James asked shocked.

"Yep, that was it," Remus replied, snapping his fingers leaning back.

"Blimey," Sirius added offended, "What is he thinking asking out our girls?"

James shot Sirius a warning look.

"James' girl," he corrected quickly, with an apologetic look, slapping James on the back.

"Ah, so you guys had your chat then? Alright, out with it." Remus said, leaning back in.

Sirius gave Remus a look with wide eyes, and Peter let out a cough that sounded a lot like, "too soon".

Remus just looked between his friends and pushed away from the table a bit, "oookay…" he drew out slowly. "Great bit of magic Pete, at least we aren't in detention right now eh boys?" he said, changing the subject.

Peter beamed twirling his wand between his fingers, he had jinxed Filtch's cat to have a spat of the flu, and Filtch had to run off and care for poor Mrs. Norris, never showing up to tend the Mauderers.

"Too, bad we didn't go outside to join Lily like she asked," James added, sullenly.

He was doing his best, but inside he was severely disappointed in himself. This set him back – who knows how long. What if she and Derek hit it off? He should have made his move this summer; he should have paid her more attention. He should have kept a closer eye on Sirius; he should have stopped the guys from acting like prats all last spring. His life was turning into one long list of 'should haves.' He needed to start acting on impulse; he couldn't afford to miss another opportunity.

Sirius broke his train of thoughts, "Oi, here comes Julie, she is been expecting me to ask her to Hogsmeade. Every time someone mentions it she shoots me this look of longing." James craned his neck towards the girl's dormitory where Sirius' eyes were. Julie was walking deliberately towards their table looking like if she tore her eyes away from Sirius for a second he might disappear.

"Sirius, we need to talk," she announced, putting her hands on her hips. Sirius just leaned back and put his hands behind his head.

"Alright, talk then," he was totally taking advantage of the situation.

"Are you going to ask me to Hogsmeade or not?"

"I was thinking about it."

She looked utterly pissed off, "and?"

"I was thinking I would ask you," she relaxed a bit, "but then you walked over here and you are trying to push me around." James smiled; Sirius did not let people push him around, even attractive upperclassmen girls. It was just then that he noticed Janet had walked over to the table with Julie he hadn't even noticed her under that hideous yellow hair.

Julie stepped back and tears started to well in her eyes. She must have really liked Sirius.

Sirius just leaned forward and looked at her for a moment. "Well don't cry over it, if you wanted to go with me, why didn't you just ask?" as if it was the most obvious answer in the world, as if Sirius wasn't too intimidating to ask.

"Well, then, will you go with me?" She sputtered.

Sirius stood up smiling, a triumphant look in his gray eyes from getting his way, "Glad to my lady." And with that he wrapped his arm around her and they walked towards a more private spot in the common room, leaving Janet standing at the table looking a bit lost.

"Oh!" she explained, when she realized she was just standing there. She pivoted and began to walk back to the staircase.

"Oi, Jan?" James called to her retreating back; she stopped and turned back looking excited. She strutted back to the table looking confident after being called out to by James –drop dead gorgeous- Potter. Who was about to ask out Janet –I'm a model and the only one good enough- Johnson.

"Want to go to Hogsmeade with me?" She wasn't Lily, not even close, but that doesn't mean he's going stag anywhere anytime soon.

"Oh, I guess so, yes," she replied trying to play cool when all of Gryffindor knew she was screaming inside. James immediately regretted asking her as she raised her head and flicked her corn colored hair behind her shoulder in victorious way.

"You know as a friend," he quickly added. After he said it, her eyes appeared to be trying to escape her head, but she kept a stone face.

"Of course," pause, "I'd like that," and pivoted and walked off with a little less confidence than before ignoring her fellow eavesdropping Gryffindors snickers.

* * *

: )


	9. Anticipation

**Disclaimer: **This world belongs to J.K. Rowling so I'm just playing around with characters and ideas already created. Enjoy!

* * *

**Chapter 9: Anticipation**

Lily sat cross-legged on Judith's bed, listening to Janet read one of the many love notes Jude was sharing with them. As weird and creepy, Lily thought Andy's relationship was with her friend; it did seem to be pretty innocent from the notes he wrote her. Lily hadn't had the courage to ask, but she assumed her relationship with him was like every other like that. Everyone knows why 7th years go after 4th years.

"Aww, he is sooo sweet!" Janet said, in a high-pitched voice only certain fake girls are capable of making.

"They were really sweet notes Jude," Lily added in a more human voice brushing her hand through the dozens of notes spewed across the bed.

Then before she really knew what she was doing, she heard herself talking, "Derek wrote me a really cute note today."

Both girls heads turned towards Lily's, but with opposite expressions. She distinctly heard Janet's famous snort, but good 'ol Jude spoke up first, "Well let's see it then!" She actually sounded excited at the aspect of comparing notes. Lily suddenly felt like they were 2nd years again.

She felt a wave of embarrassment wash over her, her note from Derek was not like Andy's, and it was not a note of love and passion, rather a cute, "I like you, and I'm think of you," note. She tried to recall what word she used to describe the note to Janet and Judith. She had said cute right?

"Oh, um, it's not romantic or anything, but," she faded off as she launched head first from the bed reaching for her potions book where she was almost positive she left it.

"Damn," she muttered to herself.

It must have been left downstairs. She let her body slide off the bed and she headed straight to the staircase without a word. She envisioned the table that she did her homework at with Jude earlier and was sure it must be there. She felt her face grow hot at the prospect of someone finding it and reading it.

Lily left without saying anything, and shivered at each step when the bare ball of her foot would collide with the cold stone surface of the stairs. Hugging her body, she paused when she saw James. He was studying and his hair was sticking up in every which way like it normally did by this time of the day.

"Oi, Potter," He looked up at her, "Have you seen some parchment folded up around here?"

"Erm," he paused and leaned back, "No, why? Getting love notes from Mr. Ravenclaw?"

Lily felt herself blush involuntary. He was the only person who could make her blush about something normal, and make her feel like a silly girl. Quickly pulling herself together she placed her hands on her hip and flicked her head as to throw her hair behind her shoulder only to realize it was in a bun. Damn.

"Maybe, Jealous? Not getting enough attention from Janet?" She said, trying to recover from her blush and fake hair flick.

James let out a low chuckle. The chuckle he had only adopted in the past year when he reached his full low man voice.

"I hear it's getting pretty serious between you two," Lily added teasing, but with the most serious tone she could manage.

He snorted this time and she thought he wasn't going to answer her again but he teased back, "Ya I heard I proposed to her in front of all of Gryffindor too."

"I hear you only like her because she is a model," she added joking, but took a step closer to the table as the thought crossed her mind that it might be true.

He snorted again and shook his head returning to his Potions book. What was with all the short answers and snorts?

Then Lily remembered what she came down for in the first place, "Well if you haven't seen the parchment…" she took my wand out and as she began to speak James' head shot up in horror.

"Accio, Note!"

As if in slow motion the parchment she had been searching for flew out of the pocket of James's cloak that was draped behind him.

Lily didn't even catch it; it just flew into her palm then fell to the floor.

"But," she started, dumbly.

"Oh ya, I completely forgot," he said, dramatically slapping his forehead. "I grabbed it to return to you. All this work on shield charms you know," he said, motioning to his homework lay out in front of him.

He had his potions book out.

"I completely forgot," he repeated. He was looking at his book and around the room, but anywhere but Lily.

"But" she started again. "You fancy Janet, you asked her to Hogsmeade-"

"As a friend," he interrupted.

"And your stealing my notes," she finished her thought.

"I asked her to accompany me as a friend," he repeated, looking Lily in the eyes.

She continued to look at him with what must have been a really empty dumb face until he looked away. Then she just pivoted and walked back to her dorm trying to make sense of what just happened.

She re entered the dorm and walked straight to her bed and drew the hangings around it ignoring her roommates questioning looks. She let her head hit the headboard and heard Janet; "I knew she was making it up, how pathetic."

Lily didn't care what she thought. If she didn't believe her she could just walk back downstairs, it was still on the floor where she dropped it.

Unless maybe she wanted to search her date's pockets, he might have it.

Her rude statement was quickly followed by her whining an 'owwww'. Judith must have pinched her. Then Judith quickly entered Lily's bed with a candle.

"What happened?" She asked.

"Honestly, I have no idea…" she whispered.

"You didn't make it up did you? Janet is just jealous." Lily shook her head no and allowed Jude to curl up next to her. They both slid down so they faced each other and could have a whispering conversation. They used to do this frequently, and when Janet would whine and complain they would just tell her there was no room.

"So what happened then?" she repeated.

"He took it."

"Who took what? Your note?" she asked.

"James did. He found my note from Derek and he took it. I was looking for it, and he said he didn't see it."

"How do you know he took it then?"

"I summoned it. Flew right out of his pocket."

They just looked at each other for a while both contemplating what this meant.

"He must still like you then," She sighed.

"What do you mean still like me?" Lily replied quickly, "he never liked me, we kissed once, and then he and his bloody friends made a fool of me the rest of the year."

"That doesn't mean he didn't like you Lily," she said, in soft voice. "Honestly, he is just too loyal to his friends to ditch them for a girl he has a crush on."

"He maybe loyal, but I am not just some girl Jude, I've known him forever. He lives down the street for goodness sake. He could have patched things up this summer if he liked me," Lily replied, harshly against her softness.

"Look, I'm not expert, but it's like you said, you've lived down the street from each other your whole lives. Now all of a sudden the person he can talk to, hang out with at any hour of the day, experiment-"

"New things with," Lily finished, nodding.

"Exactly, like last year, when he kissed you. There is this trust between you two and it's not like he is going to make out with Remus. But now he is in a whole new boat, his best friend from down the street has boobs, legs and an ass to go with it."

Lily put on a fake affronted look, but couldn't completely hide her smile.

"All I am saying Lily, is you two are meant for each other, and the day you realize your best friend has a wanker, you will thank me."

That was all that was said between them the rest of the night, but they spent the rest of the night in Lily's bed. Having Judith curled up with her was the perfect thing for their distancing friendship.

* * *

On the day of the Hogsmeade visit, or the day of the "super date" as Katie and Torey were calling it, Lily decided to wear outfit number four. She felt like it made her look the most mature, but in a good way, like in a way that will leave people guessing what year she was.

She fiddled with the collar for a few moments before she decided to check in and see what Katie and Torey were wearing. She knocked quickly, but then let herself in.

"Oh my God," she felt her jaw drop. "You girls are quidditch players?"

They looked at each other then eyeballed each other's outfits, then burst out laughing.

They had on the, well for lack for a better word, most promiscuous outfits possible.

"What the" Lily began, but Katie cut her off.

"Honestly, Lily, we are going out with guys two years older than us, we have to keep their attention somehow." She ended with a flick of her hair, which had been magically lengthened with, an extension charm.

"Ready?" Torey finished, and they walked right past where Lily was standing dumbfounded by the entrance to their dorm.

The boys were due to meet them in the entrance hall so they could all spend the day together, like a triple date. It was decided between the three girls that if they were separated there would be no hard feelings. Lily already had a feeling that her and Derek would venture off on their own, especially since it was the others girls first trip into town. It hasn't been that long since her first trip in, she could remember how giddy Judith and her were.

Lily searched the crowd as they descended the stairs that fed right into it. Everyone was standing around waiting to be checked out, but she saw the boys nowhere. She could feel eyes looking at her, but she was too distracted in her own search and by her two tomboy companions making quite an entrance of their own.

She felt dumb as they waited at the bottom of the stairs for the boys, the crowd was thinning and they were nowhere to be seen. But just as the thought entered her head she felt three pairs of eyeballs mentally undressing her.

"Hey! We look hot too!" Katie huffed, pulling the boys out of their trance.

Derek let out an awkward cough before grabbing Lily's elbow and walking her to the door.

"Sorry about that. School uniforms make days like going to Hogsmeade seem like a holiday!"

Lily smiled sweetly at him to break the ice, "Don't worry about it, I'm flattered."

Derek checked both of them out and soon they were stepping into their own carriage. Before she knew it they were already on their way. Alone.

"Oh no, shouldn't we have waited for the others?" she asked, worried.

"Ha, not after they looked at you like that! They're on their own." He laughed patting her knee.

Lily just leaned back and smiled at the gesture. She was much more flattered by him wanting to prevent her from being ogled than she would be if he were trying to show her off.

Derek seemed to be set out to prove that chivalry is not yet dead. He spent the day opening doors for Lily, buying her anything she wanted and avoiding clichés. He wouldn't even go to The Three Broomsticks claiming his date was going to be different than every other date she would go on at Hogwarts, and he definitely stayed true to his word.

"Okay, last stop of the date!" Derek said, enthusiastic throwing his arms open in front of a shabby consignment shop.

Lily looked confused to the rotting sign on top of the store then back up to his face which shown with pride and anticipation.

"Um, Derek?" she began, but he simply threw his arm around her shoulder and guided her into the shop with a jingle of the bell.

The storeowner looked up eagerly, but sighed and turned the page of his Daily Prophet, but Derek raised a hand and waved.

"C'mon, it's in the back."

"What is?" Lily asked, more curiously. She was getting the idea there was more than meets the eye about this dusty old store.

"You'll see," he said grinning.

Right when she thought she would burst from anticipation he opened another door that opened to a room that was floor to ceiling, wall to wall, used books.

Her jaw dropped, why is such an awesome store being kept secret from everyone?

She turned around and smiled at Derek fully expecting a smile from him, but he had an expression of worry etched onto his own face.

"So what do you think?" he asked, pushing past her distractedly. "I have seen you in the library a lot, and I, well this place is full of antique books, you can really get lost in here," he finished, and turned around to look at Lily. She was grinning ear to ear; the date couldn't have gone any better.

On impulse she jumped up and wrapped her arms around his neck for an intimate hug. This was one of the most thoughtful things anyone had done for her. He was right, she though, her standard for future dates certainly has changed.

* * *

By Monday it seemed all of the students knew about Derek and Lily, even despite the fact, that they spent majority of the date in a secret bookstore. Girls who passed by them always looked Lily up and down with curious looks, as if they were trying to find what set her apart from them. She hadn't even realized Derek was so desirable until after they were together, but apparently he had been being chased since he set foot in this castle.

If she didn't know any better she would say that Becky and Remus were the new Hogwarts "it" couple. They seem like they have always been together, one of those couples that you can't even recall them ever being single anymore. The downside of this was that she began seeing less and less of Bec.

As for James, unfortunately for him, Janet had turned their "date as friends" into something positive, for herself at least. She was proclaiming to be James' best friend, and closest confidant, "there isn't anything they didn't tell each other." Sirius and Lily had a great time bullying James about "ditching" them to be best friends with Janet. They would whine loudly at dinner about stupid things, like "James, how come you don't tell _us _your favorite food?" "James, I will do your homework for a week if you tell _us_ what kind of shampoo you use!"

As for being in a different house than Derek, they were making it work. They had no mutual friends since the whole triple date thing didn't pan out. Katie and Torey ended up ditching Derek's friends half way through their date. But that only meant more alone time for them when they did get the chance to be together. Everything seemed balanced and perfect, and Lily couldn't wait to see how everything would turn out.

For the time, she was choosing to feign ignorance of the fact that James has not once asked her about Derek since the "note incident," or that he looked her way anytime the House of Ravenclaw is even mentioned.

* * *

a/n: soooo....


	10. The Friend and the Boyfriend

**Same disclaimer applies, everything is J.K. Rowling's except my plot.**

* * *

**Chapter 10: The Friend and the Boyfriend**

Early on a Wednesday morning, Lily was pulling her hair into a ponytail at ease. It was so early in fact, that she was the only one up, and had the mirror all to herself. She gave herself one more appraising look before slinging her bag over her shoulder, and leaving for the common room.

It had become ritual for her to meet James three mornings a week, before breakfast, to work on homework together. It was fast becoming something she looked forward to, and got her out of bed. Most of the time it was just them alone, but occasionally his friends would join them too, which she found she didn't mind. They all had their own separate skills and attributed to the group in different ways. She felt proud when she could assist them in potions or charms, which became the subjects they turned to her for.

Today however, James was alone when he looked up at her dormitory stairs, and smiled. She beamed back at him, and she realized in the last month, since their last Hogsmeade visit, how lucky she really was. There was a time, when she thought she had lost James forever to his mysterious boarding school. She really didn't count her blessings enough that she still had him.

"Ancient Runes?" Lily asked, sitting down to James' left.

"Ancient Runes," James affirmed.

"I'm only half finished," Lily said, brightly. She was disappointed she hadn't finished the night before, but somehow she couldn't bring the smile off her face.

"Hopefully it's the half I didn't finish," James added, "We should begin coordinating our homework."

Lily would not have it, "_Then_ we would learn," she said, sarcastically.

"Oh, it does not take 50 problems to retain the information, 25 would suffice, and then you would save time."

"_You_, would save time, you only finish half on my behalf so I don't feel dumb. I know you could finish the homework in half the time it takes me."

"Ah, but then who would I meet before breakfast," he grinned, throwing an arm around her.

"Don't dumb yourself down for me!" she said, shocked throwing his arm off.

"I don't! Sometimes I just purposefully go to bed, knowing I will still have homework to do in the morning. I can't help I procrastinate!"

Lily simply rolled her eyes, and started looking over the problems she hadn't completed yet. It turned out they had in fact completed the opposite problems.

After much insistence from James, they exchanged problems and were done in five minutes, leaving them a good 30 more minutes before breakfast even began.

"So Christmas is coming up," James said, conversationally.

"Is _that_ why we have all these tests coming up? And festive Christmas decorations around every corner?" Lily turned and asked, earning a pinch from James.

"Ow!"

"You'll live," he said, smirking.

Lily shot him a glare and pinched him back on his thigh, but held the skin longer than he had. James jumped a little and flattened Lily's hand against his thigh with his own hand so she couldn't move it.

Lily blushed at having her own hand trapped between his thigh and his hand. Then she became annoyed at herself for becoming flustered by him. She forced herself to relax and again, like the pinching, had to get back at him.

He pinches her, she pinches him, he flusters her, and she'll fluster him, there was always a competition to be had.

She tilted her head down so she could look at him through her eyelashes and gently moved her hand further up his thigh, relaxing the hold he had on her hand.

James became flustered for a moment before grinning evilly at her. "Do you really want to challenge me in a "nervous" game, Lily?"

She scoffed and crossed her arms across her chest. She had certainly embarrassed herself during _that_ game before, learning James has no limit to how far he will push her, and has no point of which she could fluster him. He had gotten as far as under her shirt; examining her bra, summer before 3rd year, before she had let him claim victory. She could hardly look him in the eye without blushing for a month after that.

"My, we should finish our homework this early _every_ morning if this is what we will do with our free time," James laughed, taking in Lily's grumbling.

"So Christmas," James began again, earning a laugh from Lily.

"Yes?"

"You better get me something good," he replied.

"Oh it's real good. I'm raising the gift giving bar."

"As good as Derek's?" James asked, teasing.

Lily blushed at the question however. She was always uncomfortable talking about other guys with James. As it was, Derek and she had decided not to get each other gifts, it seemed silly to her, but he wasn't going to be around during the holidays so he insisted.

"No gift for him," Lily replied, lightly.

"Oh, been a bad boy has he?" James laughed.

"Nooo, he's just going to be on holiday in France. No gift exchanges for us."

"Mmm," James said, nodding, "I suppose I knew that."

Lily looked at him perplexed, "Why in the world, would you know what Derek's Christmas plans are?"

"He's going on holiday with a bunch of families' right?" he asked.

Lily nodded, still eyeing him with curiosity.

"Well they go every year; don't know why this year would be any different. Mum always sends some of the families that go invitations to their New Year's Ball as a courtesy, even though she always knows they will be on holiday."

Lily nodded, noticing for once that the common room was full of traffic.

"Breakfast?" she asked, standing up and grabbing her bag.

"Breakfast," James affirmed.

* * *

The next week, Lily found herself in an awkward seating arrangement, between James and Derek, and across from Janet.

She sighed as she watched Janet reach for yet another croissant. For how skinny that girl is, she sure could eat. Lily crossed her fingers that it would catch up with her, like her own mother always warns her.

"So Lily," Janet began, mouth full of food, "Do you and James always make it a habit of feeling each other up during your morning "studies"?" she finished, using air quotes around "studies".

Lily rolled her eyes, but felt James shift uncomfortably. She knew they had been flirting lately, and she knew she should stop, but she didn't want to. If Derek wanted to be with her, he would have to take Lily as was, with a male best friend.

Luckily for her, Derek happened to be the least jealous guy ever. He simply laughed at Janet's rude comment.

"Feeling up my girl mate?" he asked, leaning forward to see James.

James responded with a smile and a shrug. Lily could tell how uncomfortable he was, and he didn't have a good response.

She shot a pointed glare to Janet after this exchange. She looked miffed that her comment had backfired.

"Don't you have some other relationship you can try, and fail, to sabotage?" Lily asked.

She rolled her eyes and dropped her hand down with her fork, "Puh-lease, as if I would waste my time doing something so stupid."

"Then what would you call it? Jealousy maybe? '_Tell me Lily? Do you and James always feel each other up?_'" she mimicked, using her fake voice she associated with Janet.

James and Derek both laughed blatantly in her face, and she deserved it. She gave us all an affronted look, played the victim and left the table.

After her dramatic departure Lily turned to Derek, "Honestly, we do not feel each other up?" she said, as a question, to prove its absurdity.

"I know," he replied, smiling.

"All we do is our homework, there are other people around," she started again.

"I know," he replied, again, still smiling. "Let me walk you to class?" he asked.

Lily smiled and stood up as he slung her bag over his shoulder. He immediately squeezed her hand and led the way. As they were walking, she let her mind do the unthinkable, and compare him to James. James and her had held hands on so many occasions for so many different reasons that she practically had his fingerprints memorized.

She couldn't help but think how much better it felt to hold James'. She couldn't tell if it was because she was more attuned to him, or if it's the contrast she liked. James has large skinny hands, full of calluses, which never seemed to go away. Derek has large fleshy hands, which are always clammy. She noticed once that he wore gloves when he flew, while James didn't, and she attributed that to the difference.

Whatever the reason, she could definitely do without the clamminess.

The very next morning at breakfast, she was lucky enough to grab Becky and force her to make some Lily time at breakfast. She loved how easily they fell into conversation, no matter how long they could go without talking. It was like they had this unspoken understanding that shit comes up.

When the post flew in, Lily was quite surprised when Wilma brought a letter for her. She usually only used her owl during holidays when she was away from her friends. She wondered how Wilma would have received a letter to deliver to her.

While pondering, she flipped it over to see the Potter crest applied perfectly to seal the letter. Of course, her owl always was flying over there just for fun.

She opened the letter, and to her surprise found herself a personal invitation to the Potter's New Years Ball! She had never been invited before to their party before!

Becky leaned over Lily's shoulder to read the invitation, but didn't seem impressed.

"Mum's going," she said, through a mouth full of blueberry muffin.

"Are you?" Lily asked.

Becky rolled her eyes and made an inaudible noise through her full mouth that practically screams 'as if!'

"I bet Remus will be there," she said, leaning in suggestively to Becky.

Becky and Lily looked up at each other with only their eyes, and then both of their heads snapped, simultaneously to their left, over to the Marauders.

James and Remus looked as if they were anticipating this and were already leering at them when they looked. Remus cocked his head and gave Becky and innocent look that seemed to say, 'well?'

"Looks like I'm going after all," Bec said, to Lily as an answer to Remus's look, and my question.

He winked at her, "So, you'll be going then?" She asked.

"I supp-," but Lily was caught off as James began trying to ask her a question from down the table.

"What?" she yelled back, in response.

James said something again, but as he was speaking someone dropped a platter and it drowned out his voice.

"Didn't catch that," she replied, cupping her ear.

Then James pulled out his wand and magically amplified his voice, ten notches louder than he meant to.

"Go to the ball with me, Evans." He said it as a statement, rather than a question, as if he knew she wouldn't protest.

The sheer volume of James's question halted the entire hall. Everyone, even Dumbledore turned to look at him, then ultimately to Lily, to hear her answer.

She turned 8 shades of red and tried, unsuccessfully to brush him off, to play down the whole situation.

She flipped her hair over her should and looked up with her eyes before sighing, "In your dreams, Potter," loud enough for hi to hear, but not the whole hall.

Before James had the chance to retort or for anyone else to make a comment for that matter, Lily felt a strong, clammy hand wrap around my upper arm and hoist her gently off the bench. She locked eyes with an amused Becky, before being escorted out of the hall by Derek.

"Thanks, I still feel like there are 100 eyeballs burning into me right now," She laughed, once they reached the hall. But to her surprise Derek looked annoyed. Her laid back, anything goes, Derek?

"He just made an ass out of me," He said, looking straight into her eyes, making her blush just has hard as she had in the hall.

"I'm sorry," she said, moving toward him, "he was totally joking, just trying to embarrass me."

"No, that was uncalled for, I can handle you guys studying, but obviously he's getting the wrong impression," he said, more angrily than annoyed.

"I'm sorry," she replied again, "I'm not going to go with him."

"Go if you want," he said, crossing his arms, "I'm not here to tell you what to do, if you want to go, then go."

"I don't want to go! He was joking anyways!" she replied, astonished.

Then the Derek she knew came back, he looked at her seriously for a second, before smiling and wrapping an arm around her shoulders.

"You look so cute when you're all flustered like that," he said, right against her ear.

She felt heat set in from where his forehead leaned into the side of her head, from the breath warm on her ear, to his arm slung almost possessively over her shoulder. It was like being five times warmer than a blush.

She turned her head to face him, and he was so close that her movement brought their lips together instantly. He slid his arms around to her lower back, pulling her forward, by walking backward until his back hit a wall.

Lily stood up on her tippy toes, and pressed her hands into his chest as she tilted her head up to allow his tongue to take over her mouth. She could feel him smile against her lips as he continued to kiss her, and he used his hands to pull her hips closer to his.

They ended the kiss with several shorter, sweeter ones before Derek addressed her.

"I like calling you my girlfriend," he smiled, and she replied with a kiss. He looked as though that was just the beginning of a thought, but whatever it was, was over ruled Lily snogging him.

Once people started leaving the hall they finally stopped the kiss, not wanting an audience. They stayed close to each other, just separating their lips. Derek gazed down at her, with a slender, satisfied smile on his face.

"Lily?"

"Yesss," she smiled.

"Don't accept any dates while I'm on holiday okay?" he asked.

"Deal," she agreed, and sealed it with a ravishing kiss. Derek was a great kisser, and she was pretty positive she could kiss him all day.

* * *

a/n: last revised chapter!


	11. Growing Strength

**Disclaimer: **Same disclaimer applies, everything's J.K. Rowling's, except the plot.

**A/N:**Here it is! Raw and untouched. No beta, if you see something let me know! I just wanted to get the chapter out to you!

* * *

**Chapter 11: Growing Strength**

"I never thought I'd be saying this… but I've never been so happy that we're muggle born."

Lily giggled, and glanced over to her over worked owl, Wilma, who was currently tucked under her wing napping.

"Well my owl certainly appreciates it. She flat out refused to carry anything for me today. Our electricity using families are quite convenient during times like these."

"I love using owls, but you can't beat the telephone's handiness," Judith added.

"So how was the first –post divorce Christmas?" Lily asked, hesitantly.

"Christmas Eve with Mum, Christmas Day with Dad, meh," she replied dully.

"That's it?"

"That's it. Andy came to Christmas Eve; it was a nice distraction so to speak."

Lily rolled the word distraction around in her head; it wasn't much of an endearment for one's boyfriend. "Distraction, right. Well what did he get you?"

Judith immediately took off with her answer, as though she were waiting all along for Lily to ask, "Oh Lil, he gave me the most beautiful shirt, he knows an embroidery charm! And listen to this! He gave my sisters and my mother gifts as well; I don't think Alice will ever take her shirt off."

Lily let out a low whistle, "Well someone's upping their game, and did you deliver?"

"God, I _think_ so-"

"You put out!"

"What, No! Lil, oh no!"

"Drat, I was trying to catch you off guard, get a confession out of you,"

"Well we haven't done that…. But honestly… I don't think it's far out."

Lily sat in silence flabbergasted; Judith was always considered the goody good of their year. This would devastate her reputation.

"That's not too far out… how far out is everything else?" Lily asked.

"Um, far out would be the wrong term."

"Should I use the past tense?"

"Yes!"

"Oh my Judith! Could you please make an effort to keep me better informed? How far past are we talking?" Lily asked, insulted.

"Quite?" Judith responded as a question, and then rushed to make up for it, "I promise, when we do the deed, you'll know!"

"Hmph," Lily responded, but really was troubled by this.

"Well I've got to go! Happy New Year!"

"Happy New Year."

Lily felt uneasy as she hung the phone up. Her best friend was about to go do a seventh year, and her and Derek weren't anywhere near that. Were all the others in her year jumping ship?

She thought about how great it felt when Derek was kissing her, but then her mind wandered to her losing it to him in some abandoned corridor on the cold stone walls. No thank you.

* * *

1974 would be the year the Potter's decided to shake things up in the wizarding community.

The Potter New Year's Ball was a tradition going back 120 years, from the first year the manor was built. But this year would be different; it would mark the first year a muggle was invited, as Lily's parents had received an invitation. Despite the fact that the Evan's had a clear link to the wizarding world, this was a huge deal. This year also marked the first year a muggle born had been invited; Lily.

As it was, Lily was currently relaying this information to her parents, in hopes that they will relinquish their invitation.

"I don't think we should go," Mr. Evans said to his wife.

Lily sighed in relief and sat back in her chair. At least she had dissuaded one of them.

Her mother was not convinced and if anything, Lily's argument had proven to encourage her mother to go.

"So your saying you don't want to join me in making history?" she quipped back.

"It wouldn't be good history, Lily already said, beside the Potters and maybe a few others, we won't be well received. I'm thinking of our safety!"

"It's never been a problem at Easter Brunch, has it Lily?" she replied, addressing Lily.

"I've already explained that Mum. Why won't you listen? The Potter's gave everyone the impression that you WERE a witch, and left them to assume I was half or something."

"So why can't they assume the same now?"

"This isn't a Christian holiday is it? Minimal magic is used on Christmas and Easter in respect, but its New Years, people will be lighting off fireworks from their fingertips," she replied pinching the bridge of her nose.

Lily's Mum turned to her Dad, "I just don't think the Potters would invite us if there was an issue of our safety."

Lily had to jump in again, she felt as though she were being the adult one, "There IS an issue of your safety, and mine for that matter. The Potters invited you I'm sure with full intentions of protecting you. But do you want to make them choose if it came down to that? Make them curse one of their other friends?"

"You see dear? We shouldn't put them in that position," her father remarked.

"Mum, I don't even think I should go, and I'm a witch! The three of us alone can not fight a prejudice this strong."

Lily awoke startled that very night as a paper airplane smashed into her face. She opened her eyes to see Petunia standing over her with a murderous glare, and a very red face.

"Tell your freak friends to check the right windows next time they're sending you a love letter, or hopefully a hate letter."

Then she stormed, as much as you could storm silently, out of Lily's room. Lily had to laugh, she had secured her window so that there would be no possibility of a paper airplane window wake up, but apparently her sister didn't.

She looked at the crinkled letter and saw her name scrawled out on it. She knew it was James before she opened it, and her heart fluttered just enough for her to notice it and blush. Inside there was just a short note double-checking that Lily would indeed be attending the ball the next day. She sighed and set it on her nightstand. That was a good question, was she attending? She was definitely playing around with the idea of babysitting her mom to make sure she didn't sneak over there. But then, wouldn't her attendance be the first step to her parent's eventual attendance? Muggle born first, then maybe muggles?

* * *

Meanwhile, down the street James and the other Marauders were awaiting Lily's reply.

"I hope I transform into something really grand, you know? Like really big, I'm sick of being the smallest," Peter declared.

"I just hope you transform Pete," Sirius snickered.

"Oi, I haven't seen you make any transformation yet!" Peter yelled back.

"Well, I hate to burst your bubble, but from our research, you'll probably still be the smallest, Sirius the biggest," James added, distracted.

"Hmph, let's all just get transformed, then we'll see whose the biggest," Peter replied.

Remus always stayed quiet during these types of discussions. While he was flattered at the trouble they were going through for him, he didn't feel right encouraging them. He chose instead to change the subject.

"How long has it been since you sent it James?"

James tore his eyes away from his window for the hundredth time, "Well over an hour now."

"Well she must have read it and discarded it then. I charmed it to heat up the longer she let it hit her in the face," Sirius grinned.

Peter guffawed at Sirius's addition, "Good one Sirius!"

"You didn't," Remus said, shaking his head.

"You idiot, no wonder she's not responding! Could of spoke up sooner about this, couldn't you?" James shouted at Sirius.

Sirius put on his best puppy dog face, "I was only trying to help James."

James pointedly ignored Sirius, and Remus jumped in, "In all seriousness, do you think Lily will risk it?"

"Do you think there will be no shows is what's more important," Peter added, seriously.

The other three boys looked at Peter like he had just sprouted horns.

"How, in anyway, would that be more important?"

"Besides, it's not like Mum added a post script on the invitations, 'May be muggles in attendance,'" James replied dryly.

"I was just saying…" Peter mumbled off.

"Well anyways, Lily's better off than her parents will be if they come. But my dad talked to Lily's dad and he reckons that they won't come. I guess Lily's been hell bent on convincing them not to since the invitation arrived."

"Do you really think it will be that unsafe for them?" Peter asked.

"Well are any Blacks invited?" Sirius asked.

"You know they are."

"Well then I guess I'd say it's pretty fucking unsafe."

The four boys eyed each other worriedly, and all wished Lily had given James a reply.

* * *

The day after Lily had been woken up by Petunia she not only got yelled at by her mother, for apparently Petunia had suffered burns to her face, but she also got to talking to James.

"I understand why you don't want to come Lils, but you'd be fine. None of the adults will be interested in mingling with you if you're standing near us."

Remus grinned at this. They had a preceding reputation, so any guest who came near them was at liberty to be pranked, and they knew it.

Lily peered around James's form to give Remus a stern look as he was high fiving Peter.

"Just think about it Lily," James added.

"I know it's not that we don't want to go... I am just concerned about what it would mean for my parents if they went, if not their safety, their pride. My mother wants to go so badly, and if she thinks I am, she'll find a way to accompany me."

"Welp we tried," Sirius proclaimed, slapping James on the back.

"Honestly Lily, you're probably making the right choice, I have some nasty relatives who would not take to this change in the guest list lightly." he added, shamefully.

Lily smiled up at him sadly, "If things were different, I'd be there. But for now, I'm planning on ringing in the New Year muggle style."

"How is that exactly?" Peter asked.

Lily shrugged, "Party blowers and confetti."

"How do you get confetti?" he asked again.

"Erm, you buy it, or make it, then throw it in the air? Although, one year, Petunia and I filled balloons with confetti, then when the clock struck midnight we popped them! Made an awful mess... but that was before..." She trailed off sadly. She was literally at a crossroads, stuck between two worlds.

"Well, I'll be going now, Happy New Year," she claimed, with a forced smile.

"Happy New Year," they all said back.

"Blimey," said Peter, "You really think she's going to go home and cut out her own confetti?"

The only response he got was a smack behind his head by Sirius.

* * *

Two days later, on New Years Eve Day, Lily found she had almost convinced her mother to stay home. With Lily declaring she wasn't going, and her mother not wishing to go alone, she seemed to have resigned.

Lily was sitting wistfully in her bedroom running her fingers over the beautiful gown her mother had found for her. It seemed such a shame to waste it.

"Knock knock," her mother sounded verbally and physically, knocking on Lily's door frame.

"Seems a shame to waste it doesn't it?" she added, handing Lily a cup of tea.

"I was just thinking that actually," Lily responded, "I'm becoming you!"

"Well it was bound to happen sometime. So, is there anything I can say that will make you want to go tonight?" her mother said, running her hand over Lily's long hair.

"Mum, I want to go. It's not a question of what I want to do, but what I should do."

"You're too young to be thinking the way you are. When did you grow up so fast?"

"I don't know," Lily responded looking at her cup of tea, "I mean I've been dying to go to this ball forever, but now I get invited and its stay home and be safe or go with a big target on my back."

"Whatever happened to my brave Lily? Since when do you chose the safe option?"

"Since forever. When did you peg me for a risk taker?"

"You've always been! You got a mind-boggling letter when you were eleven, and went off into a new world all alone! What if you had chosen to play it safe?"

"That's different! You guys encouraged me, and the Potters, and I wasn't even alone, I was with James!" Lily huffed in her defense.

"Oh and we aren't encouraging you now? The Potter's didn't invite you? You think James will take his eyes off you for one second?"

Lily's eyes began to fill with tears; her chin shook from her defiance and willing to hold them back.

"Lily, its three houses away. If you're uncomfortable, come home. I would hate to see you miss out on such a big opportunity."

"There will be other New Year's Balls."

"If things are as bad as your painting them, maybe there won't be and more balls," her mother said, still petting Lily's hair down her back.

Lily had lost her inner battle, a sob escaped her lips and her mother enveloped her in a hug. James had said it himself; she would have four personal body guards.

Her mother stood up, and was standing behind her playing with Lily's hair already, "Now, how should we do your hair?"

* * *

Lily stood in front of her mirror in disbelief that she was actually going. Her mother stood behind her with her hands on Lily's shoulders, and she actually had tears in her eyes.

"You look so beautiful," was all she managed to get out before she pulled a Kleenex out of pocket.

Lily actually enjoyed getting ready, she felt like a debutant. First off her dress came from a vintage store her mother frequented, and was the most glamorous thing Lily had ever seen. It was perfect; a rose or taupe colored chiffon gown covered a beautiful pattern of gold beads. Every time the light hit her, she sparkled like a million diamonds. The dress had a sweetheart top, and she discovered she had cleavage she never knew existed. Paired with her mother's diamond earrings, and her clutch, it meant the only thing new was her shoes, which added inches to her stature, and gave her the best posture she's ever had.

Her mother had coifed her hair down with long, shiny, perfect curls. She hadn't even used magic! But Lily had already decided that once she was out the door she would charm it to stay. Now the only question was how was she to get to the ball?

She figured her options were either to walk in the snow, ruin her dress, and show up in her winter boots. Contact James, get flown over there, or get dropped off by her dad in his car. As she wanted to surprise James, she opted to be dropped off by her dad. She figured she could sneak in through the kitchen door, and no one would even notice.

"Stop fidgeting Sirius, we are your wing-man, we'll keep an eye out for your family." Remus soothed his friend.

"They are not my family!"

"Maybe they won't show," Peter added hopefully.

"Ya maybe, maybe word got about, about you know," James said uncomfortably.

"About Lily being here?" Sirius asked, grinning.

"Oh come on, don't tease him," Remus said.

"Ohhh, maybe she brought some muggle confetti balloons, your family will love that," Peter said, clapping, then being smacked by Sirius.

"Would you guys quit it? I'm about to walk down there, muggle New Years with Lily is better than a wizarding New Year Ball with out her," James said frustrated, running his hand through his hair, and turning away from his friends.

Turning in the direction they were looking, he finally saw her, what they were all speaking of. Lily was being pulled to him by his house elf.

"Master James says that I should always bring Miss Lily to you if I see her. Well I saw her! And here she is!" he squeaked and walked away, leaving Lily blushing in front her four slack jawed body guards.

"Surprise," she whispered, looking only at James.


End file.
